We'll miss you, Dr. Sima

Last week, I've done something I do quite often. I fell asleep before the kids did. 45 minutes later, I tried to return to the world of productive adulthood by checking my facebook while still in bed.
After cutesy pins and re-pins, I saw a post that looked like a bad joke. My friend posted that she called Dr. Sima's office to make an appointment and was told that Dr. Sima passed away.
I read and reread the post, suddenly very awake.
Comments on the post seemed to express condolences but I still didn't fully believe it. Dr Sima was young. Well, middle aged young, but still young. She had kids who were a bit younger than me.

I've met Dr SIma 6.5 years ago. The first thing that was very obvious about her - she was very kind. She had a kind face. She was gentle with my baby. She didn't give the aura of Dr-knows-best. Unassuming, compassionate, pleasant and personable.
She always sounded concerned about the welfare of my kids. She always gave them ( and me) the attention we needed, no matter how many patients she had in the office or how late in the day it was.

The news of Dr. Sima's passing filled me with sorrow. And regret. This past summer,  a few times, I wanted to visit her with the kids, just to say hi. But something always came up - no car, a job. I felt there was always next time.
The regret mixed with the guilt that there is no next time is quite unbearable, too. I wanted to go to her with the kids and tell her that we remember her and her kindness, to tell her one more time that she was the best pediatrician we knew. Now I can only tell it to this blog.

Good bye, Dr. Sima. May your memory be blessed.
(Originally written on September 4, 2012)

Sign of the times

A few days ago, my little daughter was playing with her toy phone.  I came closer to ask with whom she is talking.  She said she finished talking with her grandma, and now she is playing a game. She then pointed the phone at me and said "cheese, mommy!".
In case you were wondering, her phone can show cartoons, too.

Always wear clean underwear

Ok. So this post isn't about underwear at all... Though that's what I thought of at the end of the day. How some people say that their mom's told them to always wear clean underwear when they go outside-just in case something happens and they have to go to a hospital where Not clean underwear would be noticed.


Anyhow. Today was one of those Sundays. The kids woke up a bit too early and by 10 o'clock I realized that if I don't get them out of the house within minutes, bad things would happen to an otherwise good living room.

"Within minutes' resulted in:
Eh wearing a decent outfit with her new sparkly 'special occasion' tights and hair, albeit in a pony with a headband, framing her face a bit wildly;
SiM dressed in matching clean outfit;
Baby wearing *new* turquoise/purple sweatsuit (with cropped pants!), *warm* pink panda socks, *extra warm* bright green jacket;
Self wearing a cute denim skirt (which sadly shrunk over the holiday season resulting in loss of both loss waist button and some of the length), beige t-shirt, and black velvet hat (which thankfully stayed on head with perfect hair coverage).
Favorite sister joined us in her favorite Sunday getup.

We were having fun in the park for about 30 minutes, sister/baby on baby swings, self and big kids on big kid swings. It was decently not crowded and thankfully uneventful (other than Eh's hair became even fluffier and the sparkly tights got one snag).

Then SiM decided to run from 'big kids' crowd to the 'other' :) crowd. And that's how I noticed that favorite sister is talking to someone else. That someone else ended up being a couple (now with child) whom I actually introduced and whom I haven't seen in 4 years.
We were delighted to see each other and meet our new additions.

Amusingly, Baby, who carefully chooses who may and may Not hold her (or even look at her), let my friend hold her and even didn't want to go back to me! Not so amusingly though, my friend pointed out that Baby's thighs were cold and I felt a bit embarrassed explaining that the pants were "cropped" and the socks should be pulled up like knee highs.

And after I went to my car I wondered about the irony of having 47 different headbands and a 8x4 container full of hair clips, pony holders and detangler while my Eh looked like a kid from a Yahoo commercial for hair products (the one before the parent discovered yahoo:)). And the irony of having lots and lots and lots of clothes to dress little Baby and then being caught dressing her in *cropped* sweat pants on a windy day, not to mention the rest of the color scheme. The irony of me telling everyone how much fun it is to dress up girls when in reality, in a crunch, a dressing a boy is a piece of cake. And of course, the fact that if the skirt doesn't fit, Don't wear it!

In the afternoon, I had a pleasure of meeting someone I haven't seen in 6 years. Thankfully, Eh's hair was pretty, Baby was dressed in one of her cute pink outfits with full size pants, and SiM still looked put together. I, on the other hand, still had The skirt on and exchanged the hat that fit for a head scarf which was more comfortable (hopefully, my hair didn't stick out from it like Eh's did in the morning). They were delighted to see me non the less (and unlike me didn't seem to gain 30 lbs).

My 3 loyal readers know that I frequently complain about my minivan because it's a mom-car and it makes me feel like, well, a mom. But not necessarily a glamour mom but a mom whom every sedan and SUV want to pass. A mom who needs to shlep lots of groceries in one hand while shlepping a crying child in another. A mom who hardly sleeps, doesn't have time to take care of herself OR her car... You get the picture.

Well, today I felt in part like a self fulfilling prophet and in part like a lucky woman who just forgot that it Always Pays to Wear Clean Underwear. Well, you know what I mean.

Mad drivers

I enjoy a fast ride as much as anybody but it annoys me when drivers check how fast their cars can go 0->60 on a residential street. On Friday, I was crossing my street with SiM when I noticed a Honda Odyssey zooming towards us. Thank Gd, he slowed down a bit, apparently realizing that at his previous speed he won't necessarily clear us.

I blessed the car and its driver as they passed us. To my amazement, the van soon pulled into one of the neighboring driveways. Apparently, the zooming madman is my neighbor and a father of a few kids. I wanted to share my thoughts on speeding with him but unfortunately by the time I finished strapping SiM into his car seat, the zoomer was gone.

What kind of urgency is there for these fast driving moms and dads? Do they think it's ok to speed on a residential street as long as it isn't their street? ( or in case of my neighbor, as long as their kid isn't walking on it?) Do they think at all?!

GGRRRRRrrrrrrr!

Doctor's visit

Usually, Eh and SiM start making unhappy noises 50 feet away from the pediatricians office. However, last week Eh was uncharacteristically quiet (read she didn't cry) and SiM followed suit throughout MD visit. They both let the doctor listen to their lungs, check their ears, eyes, nose, and throat without as much as a peep (They didn't get weighed but I'm sure they wouldn't handled that, too).

On Tuesday, because I couldn't take my congestion anymore (read-parched lips, no voice, and nose used purely for decorative purpose) I decided to go to a doctor to finally get some antibiotics (an unfortunate necessity since I'm no longer in close contact with all my former MD/PA/NP friends). SiM asked to go with me.

He did ok in the waiting room. He asked to go to the car once we entered the exam room. But after my MD walked into the room, SiM started observing everything with fascination (while I hoped my blood pressure didn't go up just from being in the doctor's office as a patient). And the kicker- SiM accepted MD's hand and they walked out of the exam room ahead of me.

And today, my nose is functioning almost as new. Thanks Gd!

I miss my neighbors

Soon after we moved to the block we discovered that the middle aged couple who lived in a house not far from ours wasn't that friendly ( not the only ones, but the post is dedicated to them). They didn't really answer our greetings, and I remember hubby practicing assertiveness ( or just amusing himself) but saying "good morning" a few times until he's get an answer back.

Well, this couple moved. And into their house moved a family with a whole bunch of little kids. Those kids stare. And blatantly refuse all our attempts (mine and my kids) at friendship. The parental greetings are also scarce...

Well, yesterday I passed by a house that's rumored to be that to which the middle-aged-formerly-my-neighborly couple moved to. And to my surprise and disgust (or maybe just guilt?) I realized that I miss them.

With a regrettable delay I realized that I prefer middle aged snobs to younger (snobbish?) starers...

By the way, is starer a word?

Parent rivalry?

It's usually SiM who gives preferential treatment (see here) to Abba. Today it was sort of Eh's turn.

"Mommy, I gave a big kiss to Abba!' she told me. Hmm. Abba is in the office, taking care of some business. Why did he get a kiss and not me who was supervising pre-sleep jumping in bed?

"Can I get a kiss also?" I asked nonchalantly. "Ok, but let me give a kiss to SiM, first," said my firstborn while I patiently waited. SiM was touched by this show of affection from his sister and took out his pacy to blow her a kiss back. Then I was instructed to turn my cheek towards Eh and I finally got my slightly wet kiss.

At that moment I was probably the proudest parent in Brooklyn. And as an after thought I was comforted in the knowledge that even though I wasn't the first (or even 2nd) to get a "big kiss", I'm usually the one and only to whom Eh comes in the middle of the night to ask for 'hot milk, please'.

Bread and butter AKA payback

For the past few weeks, as soon as I'd turn of the lights or try to say Shma with Eh, she tells me that she's hungry and needs to eat something.

I'm well aware that it's her way of postponing her bedtime. But sometimes I give in and take her downstairs to eat a sandwich or a couple of crackers. To make a long story short, it's becoming a scary routine where as soon as she gets into her bed Eh says that she'd like to eat crackers with cream cheese ( or 2 crackers, or just crackers...).

I'm trying to take this in stride. May be she is really hungry because she isn't a great eater (and there are only so many creative pasta suppers I can make- and anyway she prefers her pasta free of any 'dressing').

Or maybe it's just payback for all those times I made a scene of not going to sleep without getting my 'bread and butter'? I remember having a phase where I'd have to eat bread and butter (after staying in bed for a bit) before going to sleep...

A couple of days ago I told my mom about my 'crackers with cream cheese' issue. I even apologized for driving her crazy. She told me it wasn't a bother at all... And if that's the case, maybe this isn't payback but just an opportunity for Eh and me to have our little girl-chats over some crackers.

Crayola vs Laffy Taffy

The other day Eh and SiM were coloring. SiM's coloring activity usually involves a bit of scribbling and lots of opening and covering the markers. So while the kids were busy coloring, I went to the kitchen to make some tea. I came back, commented on Eh's beautiful pictures, then looked at SiM. And I had to do a double take because in a minute's time it took me to make tea SiM decided to digress from his usual coloring activity and try to taste the marker. Or was it 'eat' the marker.

His lips , tongue, and even tips of his front teeth were deep blue. (It must've been a fresh marker.) Amid adamant protests I quickly rushed to wash out ' the blues' before anybody else would notice what the kid has done under my supervision:) Thankfully, the markers are washable and in less than 3 minutes SiM was pretty much back to his usual 'color'.

Then, a couple of days later, grandma took Eh for pizza and the 'pizza man' gave Eh a laffy taffy for frequent patronage. Eh was so proud of her candy, she brought it home and showed it off to everyone. Then, she ate it.

After the whole PM routine of brushing teeth, putting on pjs, and reading a book, I said something that made Eh giggle. And I saw her tongue. It was deep blue ( apparently food coloring not as easily washable as the dye in the marker).

This left me wondering: should I be scandalized by my kids eating candy and be cool if they taste a marker once in a while?

He did it again

Last night some time between 12 and 1 I heard SiM coughing. After some time he called 'mommy'. So I quickly got up for my baby, gave him his "geh" ( pacifier) and went back to bed. In a couple of minutes I heard another 'mommy', got up again, gave him a drink, went back to bed. In less than a minute I heard SiM calling "abba" and as much as I wanted to feel hurt by this dismissal I couldn't stop laughing.

Abba brought SiM a fresh drink after which SiM fell asleep. This wasn't the first time SiM gave hubby the preferential treatment and I'm hoping in the future he'll start out with 'abba' first:)

Patriotic

As I've mentioned many times before I'm a proud flag waving American. So imagine how warm and fuzzy I felt when after coming from (a long day of partially gratifying) work I saw that my daughter came home with her hand made flag that said "don't forget to vote". My little patriot.

On to more routine matters. My kids, especially my little son, have a hard time adjusting to the return-from-daylight-savings-time. Two days ago, around 6:30 I told my daughter that I'm going to put the baby to bed and then she can watch "Elmo visits the Doctor" before turning in.
Imagine my surprise when a few minutes later my baby rejected his good-night-bottle with an unhappy no ( which he usually greets with delight) and started crying. I asked him what's the matter and he said 'unt Elmo data'. I was so impressed I let him watch Elmo data. He didn't watch much because he started dosing off after a few minutes. And I'm still impressed with his power of persuasion.

I thought I knew you, what did I know?

I just realized that I can empathize with K fed who got a text from Britney saying that 'it's over'. But I digress. Here's my story of the week.


I got a text from our babysitter on Friday night (albeit I read and responded to it on Sat night) saying " Very important call me as soon as u get this text".

What can be so important that she sent me a text on Fri night? Why she couldn't just call? Did she get in trouble with the law and needed bailing out?! I was debating whether is was a good idea to call her at 9:45PM but then again, if someone needs bailing out, it's never too late.

I called her. With a wear voice she told me that her grandma is not doing so well and asked for the babysitter by name. So, she's flying back to her country ASAP. But, she's got number of 3 reliable and responsible young ladies to cover for her because she doesn't want me to be stranded.


In timesless words of Bertie Wooster " she could've knocked me down with an f".

I wished her luck and hung up. She even said she'd keep in touch and call back in a few days.

Hubby called her in the morning, asking for how long she's going, whether she needs help with her apartment, etc. She already said she planned on staying for a while, not sure when she's come back, the apt and the ticket are taken care of.

Her aunt, the original referral, called us later, apologizing. To make a very long story very short, our babysitter planned her emergency for at least a month. She disconnected her phone before noon on Sunday (I'm sure to ease the process of being in touch) and as far as we were concerned, vanished into thin air.

After working for us for a year, she didn't even care for a proper good bye, let alone at least a day's notice, closure, and all the other stuff our society seems to find important.

Who the heck watched my kids for a year, pretending so well to care?

Happy birthday SiM

I ment to post this on his birthday, but managed to be 24 minutes late. Well, a little late but a most sincere happy birthday to my big boy! I can't believe it's been a year...

Cruiser

I didn't really get a chance to post an 11 month old update and Sim is almost a year old.
So a quick recap ( though my recaps notoriously lack the necessary detail):
-definitely a confident cruiser by 11 months;
-refused eating the classic 'baby food' from the jars-it's table food or nothing;
-ABBA! is his most popular word. Amusingly, abba worked very hard @ teaching out daughter to say that word ( pretty much since she was 3 months old). With this one it came with no effort on his part but with much delight on mine. Every time the baby wakes up in the morning, he calls 'abba', so I just tell my hubby 'he's calling you":) and continue pretending that I'm still asleep.
-he knows what he wants and points at it quite nicely;
-if something that he wants is in his sister's possession, he tried to take it away and very very quickly scoot in the opposite direction;
-albeit his favorite word is abba, he is mama's boy and every time he sees me he demands to be picked up or as a last resort, given undevided attention;
-he finally has a (cute) tuft of hair that's curling up in the back

Why?

I was waiting for my big toddler to start asking "why" question, and today it finally happened.
All of a sudden, I heard her ask why 4 times in less than 5 minutes!

YAY! I mean, why?

Something I got from my oldest sibling...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24397323/?GT1=43001

Eviction update

To make a very long story very short, SiM has left my bed!
Yay!
But a part of me misses that stage in our lives. Thank Gd he still allows me to kiss him

And then, it happened!

My baby woke up only twice last night and the first time hubby took care of him. So, to make a long story very short- I got about 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep last night! Life is beautiful!

SiM, you did it!

Though my profession is not my identity, it does give my world a certain tint. I notice people's postures, various 'structural' deformities, splints, casts, slings, etc. I notice little kids movements, infants' motor milestones, and lots of other useless stuff.

In short, my baby wasn't reaching some of his milestones fast enough for me. So periodically, I would make him do what he is 'supposed to' at his age or complain to my relatives that he is not the fastest to achieve ALL of the milestones of his age.

One of my complaining sessions happened on Saturday when I (yet again) told hubby that my poor baby doesn't move around efficiently. "Look at him, my poor baby can't sit up by himself!" So hubby put the baby on his stomach. And to my amazement and delight, SiM slowly but beautifully sat up!

Any other mom would probably cry from pride and joy and would rest her case. I was happy and proud for a minute but then I remembered to complain that if SiM falls and ends up on his back he just stays that way... Hubby decided to test that theory as well. Sim smoothly rolled from his back on his stomach and then sat up without complaining even a peep!

Hence now I'm just being a proud mom and showing off or just bragging about his new skills (it took me less than a week to put it in writing...).
Way to go, SiM!

Eviction, Continued

As always, it's past my bedtime so I'll make it quick. For the past two nights, the baby stayed in his crib with his dad giving him bottle 2x. However, when it was my turn to pacify the baby, I tried feeding him in my bed and we were back to square one.

Tonight however, we went to a wedding and my baby didn't fall asleep until 9:40. So there is hope he'll sleep a bit better

My typing was interrupted by a loud yelp. Sigh. However, he is still in his crib as I sign off:)