Midnight thoughts

Third night in a row SiM wakes up coughing and can't seem to fall back asleep easily. Hubby's taking care of him and I suddenly find myself very awake.

An intrusive thought keeps coming up of just how much I miss my previous work assignment. Nostalgic memories of the hospital-like environment, kosher cafeteria with its brew-it-yourself coffee, hot breakfasts and lunches, the doctors, the nurses, rec programs, the morning rounds with self-important-too-numerous-to-count-vice-presidents, the almost-always-annoying-but-sometimes-cool MD and PA students, social workers, dietitians, volunteers...lots of friendly and lots of unfriendly people who finally started to respond to greetings...

(I'm aware that I sound like an immigrant whose memories over time make everything and everybody 'back home' seem bright and beautiful, educated, and polite...Awareness is not helpful this time.)

I tell myself that I was 'the bigger person' for leaving instead of staying and getting two ignorant 'colleagues' reassigned or fired. But then, I remember that good guys finish last and I don't want to be the 'bigger', 'better', 'more mature'...

Hope SiM gets better soon (for many reasons and ) because typically midnight thoughts are quite unproductive.

Insomnia

I think this is the first night my little bedfellow has slept for 4+ hours straight ( if you don't count a little squeek he made when he turned over). Naturally, it's also the night when my 2 year old darling Eh misplaced her pacifier approximately at the same time the squeek happened. Both situations were resuloved pretty quickly however I've been awake for the past 2 hours (probably to celebrate the ease with which the above mentioned situations were resolved).

A dollar saved is a dollar earned

Last night was another one of those nights when I sat by the computer around 11Pm and felt as fresh as a cucumer in my fridge ( For those who haven't seen my refrigirated cucumbers they are typically slightly wilted but still fit to be eaten in a salad cut up into small pieces).
So I decided to check my bank account, my email, my facebook ( thank you Moshe for convincing me to join- I have one more excuse to stay up late), baby gap, banana republic, gymboree...And that's when I got stuck.
They had some promotional deal going on. And based on the clock, it just started so all the sizes were still available! How can I possibly bypass an oportunity to buy ( yet another) matching outfits for my daughter and my nieces and matching outfits for daughter and son?!
So my shopping bag quickly filled up to 20-something items. Exciting yet obscene because the box with 20 something items @ my door step will be quite large, hubby would most probably see it first and i'll have a hard time explaining my reasons for buying the stuff.
So I trimmed the shopping bag to high teens. Not bad at all, considering all the bargains they had.
Then I remembered that I have a 20% off coupon to be used online only. The only thing I didn't remember is where I put this coupon...
[As a side note, my desk is the funeral home for all the letters, circulars, periodicals, professional publications, and bills prior to their departure to the recycling bin. However, for some of these items the viewing can last for days, if not weeks. In short, my desk is cluttered.]
I quickly tried to look for my coupon on my desk which I almost cleaned last weekend. I didn't find it. Then I remembered that I went shopping a couple of weeks ago and the coupon may be in the trunk together with my loot which I slowly unload (not to create panic by bringing it all in at once). The only problem was- it was now after 1 AM, I was in pjs, upstairs...
But what the heck, 20% off my high teens items in the shopping bag can buy me another outfit.
So I went downstairs, out to my car ( which was thankfully parked in front of my house), and to the trunk. I got the bag which I had the coupon and then the trunk refused to close. It's done that a few times before but somehow at 1:18 am it seemed more dramatic if not borderline creepy- me standing on an empty street, repeatedly slamming the trunk and it refusing to close...
It closed after what seemed like an eternity -5th attempt.
Then I quitely came back upstairs, opened the bag, searched through all the stuff I almost forgot I bought and DIDN"T SEE THE COUPON!
I took all three bibs, two doggy pocketbooks, 1 pair of pants, 2 gift boxes, and wrappings out of the bag. NO COUPON.
Now I had a tough choice to make. Do I buy the stuff now without the coupon but with the assurance that everything I chose will be mine or do I wait for some time in late morning when I'll be albe to inspect many potential coupon hiding places, hopefull find the coupon, and place the order then ( with the possibility of some of matching-kids-pieces out of my shopping bag).
With uncharacteristic decisiveness I chose the first option. A bit sour about that extra outfit that I won't be able to purchase with my savings that didn't happen, but happy overall.
Now I have about a week to convince hubs that kids should have professional photos taken in matching outfits ( he already knows how much I love my nieces...)

Insomnia

When I was a pregnant insomniac I kind of enjoyed it. It gave me some private time to connect with the contects of my belly, think about the future, and often blog about it.
Now, every time I have a bout of insomnia, I'm afraid to start a long blog because I never know when my 6 month old ( who doesn't sleep through the night and can wake up as frequently as every 90 minutes) will wake up. I don't want to be interrupted in the middle of a thought for once lost my thoughts are seldom found.
By the way, he woke up as soon as I started the title of this entry. So I have time to write now (but darn it, the main point I was trying to say is aluding me now).
Anywho, now even if I do get up and sit by the computer my head is still filled with questions but they are typically more bizarre and less pleasant when they used to be in my pregnant days...
I have less than 6 hours til wake up, will I get up with the alarm or sleep through it? ( I can wake up later but then I will either have to make up hours and come home later OR work less hours. That one's self explanatory).
I ate 4 or 5 Godiva chocolates which I got from my sis for my daughter's bday or chanuka or both. Now, I need a drink which means I have to go downstairs. Do I make myself a decaf coffee, take some red wine, drink plain water, make nice medium tea...? Do I have to brush my teeth again!? If I drink tea would it wash off the chocolate and then I can at least eliminate the tooth brushing?
Would my baby wake up while I'm making myself tea and would he wake up my daughter before I make it back up? Would I care to drink my cold tea after the kids go back to sleep, etc, etc, etc
Anyhow, I think I'll go make the tea