My take on motherhood

Another Milestone

2011-12-24T14:55:00.002-05:00

You know how you wait, and wait, and wait for something and it doesn't come? So you stop waiting and forget about it. And when it finally comes, you are shocked, not knowing quite what to do with it.

I think that's what happened with Eh and baby teeth. She and her siblings watched Elmo talk about baby teeth and the 'grown up' teeth. They read books about it. They saw their friends and neighbors. I'm sure Eh anticipated a tooth or two falling out (I sure did and talked about it with Eh). But Eh's baby teeth stayed put and we all forgot about them.

Until tonight, when Eh was eating her favorite meal in the world, aka pasta with cheese and ketsup (bah). And all of a sudden she started crying that her tooth was hurting. My first reaction - we didn't do as well with tooth brushing as I thought we did. However when I asked to see which tooth was hurting, I realized it was a FIFO (first in, first out) right buttom tooth. I told Eh excitedly that she was going to lose her baby tooth. And Eh just started crying louder.

In the end, I bribed her by offering to sit in her bed at bedtime, and Eh stopped crying. And thus, a couple of days before her birthday, she got a shaky tooth. Yay!

Qutting Pacies Cold Turkey.

2011-10-09T15:41:00.003-04:00

I was thinking about it today, as my kids tried to fall asleep, that it seems somehow unfair that an adult can make a kid quit something cold turkey. Especially when that's something as dear as a pacifier.

Conversely, I thought how nice it may be to 'help' my downstairs neighbor quit smoking or the neighbor down the hallway clean up from all the recreational activities. Just like that, cold turkey. Adult pacifiers are not so easily taken away... But I digress.

A couple of weeks ago I decided that my kids' upcoming 2 week vacation may be a good time to finally get rid of pacies. Because there really isn't a "good" time.

I've done it once, almost 3 years ago. It went pretty smoothly except I misguidedly listened to someone who felt bad for my tiny kids. I felt bad for my tiny kids, too. After all, they were mine. So after a couple of weeks pacy free, we started night time pacies. Except there is no pure night time. There are nap times, and bad mood times, and need to rest times, and defiant times, and just because times...I was waiting for my kids to voluntarily give up the habit. But though one frequently talked about it, the other one didn't want to hear about it. And the time kept ticking. Beginning of school, beginning of Sunday program, long vacation, short breaks, stresses and stressors. No time seems to be good. Then there was the dentist 2 months ago who said they've got to (especially one of them) stop. And a smug 23 year old at work who said she just did it...
Then, quite acceidentally, (who reads school calendars?) I found out that my kids have 2 weeks vacation.

I told both the kids and hubby about the start date. I was dreading it, neither one of the other parties seem to realize what was coming. And when it was bedtime, I recapped my speech about giving pacies to a local charity fund. Then, I politely took away 2 of my son's pacies and one of my daughter's. I kind of had to snatch her spare one, there is no sugarcoating it.

It seemed almost effortless for one of them. S/he said 'yea, I'm ready to give up pacies', reminded me maybe 15 times to give her/him the vitamins ( which normally we both forget), and went to sleep within 10 minutes.

The other one took it hard. First s/he wined. Then pleaded. Then demanded. Then almost threatened (to go and sleep on the couch). Then alternated between all of the above. After about 20 minutes that lasted hours, I manage to find a distruction by counting together first to 20, then to 50, then to 100. The quiet seemed promising. Then I started counting down from 100. And s/he remembered the loss.

The pleading and demanding was pretty hard. It took quite a lot of strength on my part. And this was not the first time I took something away from my child. But there was something so eloguent and desparate in that plea to get the pacy back, that minutes seemed to stretch to no end.

Finally, probably after an hour ( not sure, I lost track of time), hubby came to the rescue, at first quite unaware of all the drama. His presence worked to distract the heartbreaking sobs. After another 10 minutes of small talk and jokes everyone finally fell asleep.

In the morning they woke up the usual 6 AM as if nothing happened. I was waiting for some questions, comments, requests. None came. We survived day #1.

The massacre in Itamar

2011-03-14T21:46:00.008-04:00

I find blogging is very much like exercising. You may be doing it fanatically for months, or even years. And then, you somehow break that routine and nothing can motivate you to restart an activity you used to love so much.

Basically, I stopped blogging (and exercising). And though many times I wanted to write a post about whatnots, I couldn't bring myself to sit down and write. And then, a massacre happened in Itamar. Young parents were savagely and cowardly murdered together with their 3 children-11 year old, 4 year old, and 3 month old. And their 12 year old daughter, who came home after a shabbat evening function to discover her parents and siblings murdered.

My heart aches and tears keep filling my eyes. I don't really have the words to describe all the emotions that are flooding me. How does one react to a horrific tragedy like this? What contributes to the anger, grief, shock - an infant and little kids who were slaughtered in their sleep? parents killed together with their young children/infant? Inhuman arab muslims celebrating horrible deaths of innocent Jewish children/family? news media ignoring this tragedy? news media dehumanizing the murdered kids and their parents as 'settlers'? the trauma of the surviving children who saw their mother and father and siblings in pools of blood?

I mourn for the murdered Fogel family as a mother, as a Jew, as a human being.
I know Gd will avenge their blood. And to find some comfort I must remember that we, Jews, are one and Am Yisrael Chai.

Always wear clean underwear

2010-10-17T22:10:00.005-04:00

Ok. So this post isn't about underwear at all... Though that's what I thought of at the end of the day. How some people say that their mom's told them to always wear clean underwear when they go outside-just in case something happens and they have to go to a hospital where Not clean underwear would be noticed.

Anyhow. Today was one of those Sundays. The kids woke up a bit too early and by 10 o'clock I realized that if I don't get them out of the house within minutes, bad things would happen to an otherwise good living room.

"Within minutes' resulted in:
Eh wearing a decent outfit with her new sparkly 'special occasion' tights and hair, albeit in a pony with a headband, framing her face a bit wildly;
SiM dressed in matching clean outfit;
Baby wearing *new* turquoise/purple sweatsuit (with cropped pants!), *warm* pink panda socks, *extra warm* bright green jacket;
Self wearing a cute denim skirt (which sadly shrunk over the holiday season resulting in loss of both loss waist button and some of the length), beige t-shirt, and black velvet hat (which thankfully stayed on head with perfect hair coverage).
Favorite sister joined us in her favorite Sunday getup.

We were having fun in the park for about 30 minutes, sister/baby on baby swings, self and big kids on big kid swings. It was decently not crowded and thankfully uneventful (other than Eh's hair became even fluffier and the sparkly tights got one snag).

Then SiM decided to run from 'big kids' crowd to the 'other' :) crowd. And that's how I noticed that favorite sister is talking to someone else. That someone else ended up being a couple (now with child) whom I actually introduced and whom I haven't seen in 4 years.
We were delighted to see each other and meet our new additions.

Amusingly, Baby, who carefully chooses who may and may Not hold her (or even look at her), let my friend hold her and even didn't want to go back to me! Not so amusingly though, my friend pointed out that Baby's thighs were cold and I felt a bit embarrassed explaining that the pants were "cropped" and the socks should be pulled up like knee highs.

And after I went to my car I wondered about the irony of having 47 different headbands and a 8x4 container full of hair clips, pony holders and detangler while my Eh looked like a kid from a Yahoo commercial for hair products (the one before the parent discovered yahoo:)). And the irony of having lots and lots and lots of clothes to dress little Baby and then being caught dressing her in *cropped* sweat pants on a windy day, not to mention the rest of the color scheme. The irony of me telling everyone how much fun it is to dress up girls when in reality, in a crunch, a dressing a boy is a piece of cake. And of course, the fact that if the skirt doesn't fit, Don't wear it!

In the afternoon, I had a pleasure of meeting someone I haven't seen in 6 years. Thankfully, Eh's hair was pretty, Baby was dressed in one of her cute pink outfits with full size pants, and SiM still looked put together. I, on the other hand, still had The skirt on and exchanged the hat that fit for a head scarf which was more comfortable (hopefully, my hair didn't stick out from it like Eh's did in the morning). They were delighted to see me non the less (and unlike me didn't seem to gain 30 lbs).

My 3 loyal readers know that I frequently complain about my minivan because it's a mom-car and it makes me feel like, well, a mom. But not necessarily a glamour mom but a mom whom every sedan and SUV want to pass. A mom who needs to shlep lots of groceries in one hand while shlepping a crying child in another. A mom who hardly sleeps, doesn't have time to take care of herself OR her car... You get the picture.

Well, today I felt in part like a self fulfilling prophet and in part like a lucky woman who just forgot that it Always Pays to Wear Clean Underwear. Well, you know what I mean.

7 teeth!

2010-08-23T22:28:00.004-04:00

Yesterday I noticed tooth number 7. Top left incisor - the cutest little white speck sticking out from the gum.
And today, my little bebe took a few crawling on all 4 steps! It's been coming for a while, because she'd assume the quadraped position and then sit ( and crawl like a little worm for locomotion).
Now, she does the all-four 4 step crawl - what can be cuter than that?
And at the end of the day, my girl actually enjoyed her bath (as opposed to howling through it) - something that happened with others but only happened one time ( month 7?) with me...

New Teeth ( different baby:)) and other stuff

2010-07-29T23:06:00.003-04:00

In the beginning of last week baby had 2 top teeth (spaced to a baby perfection) and 2 bottom teeth. Then there were 4 days of fever. And this week there Are tooth number 5 (Left top molar - who knew they can come out so early) and tooth number 6 (incisor crowning on the right side of wonderfully spaced top tooth).

Hair is slowly coming out of its hiding and 2 things are quite obvious. Baby is a brunette and she has curly hair (a couple little twirls in the back deserve a picture of their own).

Baby already ate a whole very soft nectarine, watermelon slices, tasted a dry lady bug, and can't have too many Cheerios.

Baby learned to jump and rock by holding on to her crib and she absolutely loves when her siblings join her in this activity.

On this happy note, peace out for now.

The sudden death of my tomato plant

2010-07-26T23:14:00.001-04:00

It died quite suddenly. On Saturday morning I noticed wilted leaves thinking the plant is suffering from dehydration. On Sat night I realized someone pulled it out, on Friday.

Is my plant's fate a foreshadowing for my blog?

Gardening, 2010

2010-05-25T22:29:00.004-04:00

We finally made it to Home Depot ( again) to buy vegetables. We were there 6 weeks ago to buy some flowers. The veggies weren't bought then because I wanted to buy them at a nursery.

The flowers bought 6 weeks ago didn't even get planted on the little patch of earth which I endearingly call My Front Lawn. But that's a blog post in itself. And tomatoes were just bought today. From Home Depot. Because there's parking on site.

A few minutes ago I proudly unpacked those tomatoes and some other assorted veggies picked out by the kids from the car. Immediately, I decided to immortalize the happy occasion by blogging about it.

I should probably go and water the poor things- after all they sat in a hot car for 5 hours probably thinking that Home Depot environment wasn't that bad after all...And I know that it won't rain (even if they promise 90% chance of that happening), if I'm counting on the rain to save my vegetable plants.

I'm off to water, and take pictures, and pray for another successful gardening year:)

What is love

2010-05-06T23:59:00.004-04:00

A couple of days ago SiM told me "Mommy, I love you very much!" Then he added " I love you very much because you buy me a lot of toys!" Too bad hubby wasn't there. I'm sure after hearing SiM, he'd stop saying that our house looks like a mini toy shop.

The best gift of all

2010-04-19T22:40:00.003-04:00

I came home with left over birthday cake that my department got for me. And as soon as I walked in the door I told my kids that I bought them some of my birthday cake.
SiM answered "I have something for you, mommy." And he gave me a 20x20 card that said "Happy birthday to SiM's and Eh's mommy" that his teacher made in his playgroup. The card had SiM's and his playgroup buddies scribbles inside as well as birthday wishes from the teacher.

I asked SiM if he made the card in school and he proudly said 'yea!'. And when I called the teacher to tell her how grateful I was for the card and how it touched me, the teacher said "Don't thank me. Your son came to playgroup and said 'today is my mommy's birthday'. I asked him if we should make you a birthday card and he said 'yes'..."

The birthday card SiM gave me is one of the best birthday gifts I ever received.

She tricked me

2010-03-06T22:40:00.003-05:00

On Wednesday I tried to be a good mom and took the two older kids shopping with me. We made two stops - supermarket and variety store.

The kids behaved remarkably well in the supermarket - they took turns riding in the front of the shopping card and didn't make any unreasonable demands (the extras included two bags of corn chips and a bag of sour sticks for shabbos party).

They were OK at the variety store, too. They helped me choose dairy and meat plastics for our kitchen table and attempted to buy only one mop. They later requested to ride on some 50 cent cross between a kangaroo and a rabbit and I agreed, seeing how nicely they behaved.

The ride back home was 6 minutes maximum. I think exchanged a couple of sentences with them on the way. Then we arrived in front of our house and I went to unbuckle the kids. To my surprise and disappointment, Eh's fallen asleep. When did it happen? How did I miss it? A kid falling asleep around 5:30PM is nothing but trouble....

I called her by name. No response. I called her again, and rubbed her knee. No response. I called her the third time and rubbed her knee a bit stronger. And that's when Eh started laughing with her eyes still closed!

I was relieved that she wasn't sleeping. But when did my kid get old enough to know that if she pretends to fall asleep (a skill in and of itself) in the car, that may get me going for a bit?

Boo Haman

2010-03-02T20:21:00.004-05:00

On Purim night, the kids and I went to shul to listen to the megilah. SiM took along the gragger he made in school. Eh chose to take her wand only.

Both kids enthusiastically booed every time Haman's name was mentioned and SiM shook his gragger. A few minutes later my kids noticed some other kids with lollies and SiM politely asked for a lolly, too. I dispatched Eh to get some lollies from a candy man and a few minutes later, Eh and SiM were multitasking -eating lollies and booing Haman.

What made this blogworthy? After getting his lolly pop, almost without fail, SiM would first shake the lolly, then realize that he was shaking the wrong hand, and start shaking his gragger. After I reminded him of this story today, I'm not sure which one of us was laughing harder -he or I.

memorial board

2010-01-12T15:50:00.001-05:00

Today at work while I was waiting for the elevator I glanced at the Memorial Board on the left of it and noticed a name of a man whom I haven't seen in a while. He was a quiet man. He didn't talk much to anybody but he enjoyed his life and his independence. He made an impression on me because he always tried to do everything for himself. He wanted to get dressed by himself, he wanted to eat real food ( not any modified versions of it), he wanted to be able to walk and even make his own bed. Even if it took him 5x the time it would normally take.

Every 3 months or so, this man got sick and had to be hospitalized for another month. But then he'd come back, weak but determined to enjoy his life.

And today I noticed his name on the memorial board. It wasn't even on the very bottom of the board ( the names are placed in chronological order and the board is 'cleared' in the beginning of every month) but towards the top. He passed away a while ago but it became known to the facility only recently. But considerately, his name was still placed on the board.

To quote the Beatles ..." all the lonely people... where do they all belong?"
I wonder if anyone attended his funeral. I wonder if he had one.

Fashionably late

2010-01-10T23:19:00.005-05:00

I still remember the days when I used to be punctual. That frequently meant being one of the first (if not the first) on many occasions. For example, coming to an engagement party before the engaged parties, etc. It also meant that I was always on time at work and usually didn't miss my bus, train, or plane. Basically, I knew how to manage my time.

Fast forward a couple of years. I'm so chronically late to work that I had to change my schedule. I now come to weddings by bodeken time (though I aim to come at least 1/2 hour before that) and consider myself lucky if I get to congratulate the bride before the ceremony ( not to mention missing the refreshments:)). And everywhere else? Time became a really fluid concept.

A few days ago my sister made a party which many of our mutual friends/family attended. I had every intention of coming in right on time (I didn't kid myself about coming in earlier and helping to set up). But when the party was beginning, I was still in the process of getting self and kids ready. Long story short, as I was walking in, 3 of my friends with whom I was looking forward to socializing were walking out. By the time I got my act (refreshments on my plate) together, a couple of relatives walked out before I got a chance to move beyond greetings. And albeit I very much enjoyed the party, I wished I timed things a bit better.

So, is there a hope for the return of punctuality? Only time shall tell.

Engagement Parties

2010-01-10T22:30:00.002-05:00

The other day I went to an engagement party and here's a quick summary. Almost all of the guests were wearing black ( men and women). A party planner was involved as there were cookies, cakes, flowers, tablecloths, etc. with the same theme/color scheme. There were quite a few beautiful flower arrangements and presents on display in the corner.

Apparently, this was not unique to this engagement party as I've attended another one a few months ago which had similar characteristics ( except there were more colorful clothing choices as it was in the summer). So there is the l'chaim for the family/close friends, the engagement party, the shower, and the wedding. Apparently, if anybody is anybody they are expected to bring ( chip in for) a gift at each step of the way.

When did this become a norm? Is there a trend to give a smaller gift at the wedding which necessitated all the gift giving prior to the happy event? Or was I living in a cave and this has been happening for ages?

Bake Sale

2010-01-07T16:18:00.003-05:00

I recently participated in a bake sale. I actually baked a Dunken Hines cake with a couple of added ingredients ( which made me think that the cake qualified as Semi-Homemade). I felt like a Brooklyn Sandra Lee. Until I brought my cake for the sale.

Maybe they didn't hear of Sandra? Or maybe Sandra adds more than just 2 ingredients to her semi-homemade cakes to make them desirable? Who knows. I bought one of my cakes and liked how it tasted. I was also inspired by all the other baked good there to start baking again, like I did in my younger days.

Hope this inspiration will lead to something tasty. I'll keep you (and me) posted:)

A Clueless moment

2010-01-05T10:36:00.002-05:00

The other day I joined a couple of my coworkers for lunch. For some inexplicable reason, I asked one of the of the aides ( non-professional as per immigration standards) on which visa she came to the states. She explained that one of her family members petitioned for her. Then we talked about various visas, and I mentioned something about her and her home country of Ecuador. The conversation lasted a few more minutes and then lunch was over.

An hour or so later, I saw the aide again and all of a sudden it clicked. She was not from Ecuador but from El Salvador. Someone else in our lunch group was Ecuadorian. I pointed out my mistake to her and the Ecuadorian lady and asked why neither one of them corrected me. While they said that Ms Ecuador was smiling the whole time during lunch at my error, they didn't really explain why I wasn't corrected.

This incident reminded me a scene from Clueless where Cher told her housekeeper that she didn't speak Mexican. The housekeeper got upset and Cher's brother? had to remind her that the housekeeper is from Ecuador, not Mexico.

And though I found this incident amusing, I still ask myself - Why Didn't they correct me?

References

2009-12-31T22:26:00.004-05:00

When I was younger, things seemed very simple. I either wasn't asked to be a reference, or I was asked to be a reference for someone for whom I could easily sing praises. Lately however, I find it hard being a reference. I think at risk of being thought of as a witch I have to politely decline to be a reference upfront, or suggest someone with a more glorious title.

95% of the time I just have to check off a couple of boxes, or answer a few multiple choice questions, or compose a generic letter concluding what an asset so-and-so going to be to the prospective place of employment/school. And the other 5% percent I hope ( and pray) that the check offs are leave room for vague answers, the multiple choice questions are very generic, and if I conclude my letters with just a ' please feel free to contact me for any further information' it won't look suspicious to the reader.

Because there are some people with whom I worked who were unfortunately mediocre-not bad, but not good, either; a somebody who was usually ( but not always) better than a nobody. And I was secretly relieved when they resigned. I don't want to provide inaccurate or inadequate information to the potential employer but I don't want to provide information that would be less than favorable, either. Agreeing to be a reference for someone implies that I'm on her/his side.

And so my 'new year's resolution' will be to try to go back to being blunt and transparent. Bluntness be a tad uncomfortable in the moment but it definitely eliminates nagging doubt in the future.

Happy new year!

Back to work

2009-12-22T22:34:00.003-05:00

It was bound to happen sooner or later. I had to go back to work. Surprisingly ( or maybe I just forgot the other times), it was hard to go back.

I knew this time around that I didn't want to leave a 6 week old baby and start working again. I hoped to go back when the baby was 12 weeks and I made an appearance at work on the day my baby turned 2 months.

In some ways returning to work after a 2 months absence is worse than starting a new job. I'm supposed to be in the know but I had to pause even before entering passwords to all the software that I use. Personnel changes, policy changes, all the work that for some inexplicable reason waited for my return, almost unrealistic expectations of the ones above me in the food chain for me to perform magic on reduced schedule. And I feel that I'm not the same person who worked there 2 months ago. I'm just a mom who works but who's rather be home with her baby, dropping off the older kids to school and picking them up from school on time...

In the two months that I've been home I've lost some of my immunity to human tragedy and most of my patience for frequent ignorance that is so common in my line of work. My commute became a time to reevaluate my career goals instead of just socializing with friends and family. Do I need a career? Maybe a job is good enough...

But at the end of the day, I thank Gd that I have a job that I can go back to.

Pros and Cons of taking kids to a wedding

2009-12-06T22:58:00.006-05:00

Pro: quality time spent with kids
Con: while most spent that time attending the chupa

Pro: getting an opportunity to show off my kids
Con: not getting an opportunity to talk about them

Pro: kids eating dinner without any complaints about food
Con: portions aren't big enough for a kid and an adult with a healthy appetite

Pro: Having a built in excuse not to socialize while eating
Con: Having that excuse squirm on my lap most of the meal

Pro: fitting into my pre-pregnancy dress
Con: not realizing until after returning home from the event that just fitting into something might not be enough for the desired look

Pro: kids enjoying dancing
Con: the crowded dance floor necessitating this dancing to be done while being held by mom

Pro: finding comfortable high heeled shoes in the closet in less than 2 minutes
Con: shoe being only comfortable when no attempts are made at dancing with a child in hands

Pro: bribing the kids with some take-home-to-eat-later cookies and kids forgetting about them upon returning home
Con: husband discovering and consuming the cookies before I did

Mad drivers

2009-11-29T14:40:00.004-05:00

I enjoy a fast ride as much as anybody but it annoys me when drivers check how fast their cars can go 0->60 on a residential street. On Friday, I was crossing my street with SiM when I noticed a Honda Odyssey zooming towards us. Thank Gd, he slowed down a bit, apparently realizing that at his previous speed he won't necessarily clear us.

I blessed the car and its driver as they passed us. To my amazement, the van soon pulled into one of the neighboring driveways. Apparently, the zooming madman is my neighbor and a father of a few kids. I wanted to share my thoughts on speeding with him but unfortunately by the time I finished strapping SiM into his car seat, the zoomer was gone.

What kind of urgency is there for these fast driving moms and dads? Do they think it's ok to speed on a residential street as long as it isn't their street? ( or in case of my neighbor, as long as their kid isn't walking on it?) Do they think at all?!

GGRRRRRrrrrrrr!

Pacifiers

2009-11-19T16:21:00.001-05:00

this is not a post on to-pacify-or-not-to-pacify or any of its derivatives. It's just my reflections on something I saw...

Today I was coming home from a grocery store and towards me, on a narrow sidewalk, walked a woman with a double stroller and a couple of kids in tow. When we approached each other, I gave her way and in the process I noticed how tired, even spent she looked. I also noticed a happy-looking three year old with a pacifier in his mouth.

A three year old with a pacifier in his mouth. It made me think for the next two minutes it took me to walk home. A paci in a mouth of a three year old is like a pregnant stomach to some people. They feel compelled to comment, try to remove it (pat it in a pregnant stomach case), tell stories from their experience. But in both cases, NoOne cares for these displays of attention. I saw how tired the mom looked, and I think I know why the three year old had the pacifier.

In short, it's socially unacceptable for a stranger to solicit advise on, for example, use of laxatives to someone who looks constipated and it's just as unacceptable to give advice on pacifiers or/and prenatal demeanor.

Mazal tov to Moishe Holtzberg

2009-11-18T23:12:00.003-05:00

"Thousands Mark Anniversary of Mumbai Terror Attack, As Moishe Turns 3 Celebrating His Upsherin " reads one of the articles in VosIsNeias.

It's been a year since terrorists murdered close to 200 people in Mumbai including Moishe's parents and 4 other Jews in Chabad house, Hy'd. My memory of this event is very clear still. The horror, the disbelief, the relief unon hearing that Moshe was saved, praying and hoping against hope that there were survivors in the Nariman house.

So, thank Gd for little Moishe and happy birthday to him. Hashem should comfort the families of the victims. And in words of the hero, Sandra Samuel, her message to the world is "to carry on life, be strong and that's it."

What's your name

2009-11-10T23:44:00.002-05:00

Today, while on my way to pick up Eh from school, I met one of my neighbors. She wished me mazal tov on the new baby, asked me how we both are.

As we were parting, I said 'Good to see you, Rivky!'
"Hmm... Rivky is my upstairs neighbor. My name is Malka.' my neighbor replied politely.

I apologized for my mistake and told Malka that from now on, I'll call her by her right name.
However, two hours later, to my great embarrassment I remembered having a little chat with Malka before that ended with 'Good to see you, Rivky!' and 'I'm sorry, I won't forget your name now!'

I think I'll keep my day job

2009-11-08T23:11:00.006-05:00

While on maternity leave and nursing, I have some free time to read, watch the cooking channel, or eBay. Sometimes I choose eBay.

While pregnant, I managed to eBay and purchase too many items. So at this point in my life, I tried my luck as a salesperson and attempted to sell some of my maternity stuff. I listed one of the maternity dresses that I bought in a lot. I didn't wear it because it wasn't my speed and used.

The dress sold for an obscene $70. Albeit new it costs close to $200, I described the dress as having minor signs of wear, and I was naturally excited that it raked in so much. My excitement was somewhat short lived. Here's a condensed story in form of emails...

Sally Hazel (SH): hi, I sent you an invoice earlier today with two different shipping quotes (2 different services). Please let me know if you didn't receive it for some reason. thanks, Sally
[Paypal indicated that buyer was from London. After I emailed her an invoice, I received a 'request for total due'. I sent the above email as an explanation of my invoice.]

Buyer (B): Hi, I am now confused. Did you send me shipping quote for the US or the UK?I am now in the US NOT in London. Let me know and I'll pay straight away. Many thanks, Violetta

SH: Hi, I sent you a bill for your London address. Please change your address on Paypal and I'll be able to send you another invoice. sorry for the inconvenience, Sally

B: [Requested total from the seller]

SH: hi, I cannot change the bill until you change your address. sorry for the inconvenience. thanks, Sally

B: Hi, I've changed the address but it won't let me change the country! so now it seems as though canal street is in the UK... Hmm... Does that work? Thanks and sorry for inconvenience..Violetta

SH: hi, please confirm your shipping address. paypal is giving me a hard time. thanks, Sally

B: [emailed her address]

B: Hi,I just received the dress and I am unfortunately not at all happy with the condition. What you described in the listing as 'minimal piling present under arms' is in reality heavy piling, especially over the right breast, in very plain view. I wouldn't have minded light piling under arms but I think the dress is not at all in the condition advertised. Please advise as I wouldn't have bid $70 for a dress in such poor condition. Many thanks, Violetta

SH: hi, Sorry you aren't' happy with the dress. I thought I described it accurately ( I even asked a second opinion before listing it). Please ship it back and I'll refund your $. Or you can drop it off in Midtown during business hours if that would be more convenient ( let me know and I'll give the the exact address).Thanks, Sally

SH: I just thought of something else. If the dress fits you- to save you the time of returning and me of relisting the dress- you can bring it to cleaners to remove whatever piling bothers you. I'll issue you partial refund. Let me know if that's something that'll work for you, thanks, Sally

B: Hi, I'm sorry but in the condition it is in I don't think the dress is worth half what I paid for it, even if drycleaner managed to work miracles.I can come drop it off tomorrow. Could you give me an address? Also, would you refund Paypal? Many thanks Violetta

SH: No problem, I'll refund your account as soon as I get the dress . but since I didn't hear from you yesterday and my friend who works on Lexington only works Mon through Fri, please ship it. Thanks, Sally

B: Ehhhr... It's Saturday tomorrow so you wouldn't be able to receive it by mail before Tuesday anyway?!? I find your inflexibility disheartening. Oh well.

SH: Shrug. I'm bending over backwards to accommodate you with a return of an item which is normally not returnable ...I wasn't able to reach my friend for exact address . I'll email you by Sunday with the address . Please return the dress by Mon between 9-5 business hours. Thanks, Sally

SH: My friend will be at work tomorrow from 8:00 till 5:00 with a break for lunch from 1:00 to 2:00. The exact address is ... You can call 212-...and ask for... - she will meet you in the lobby, if you do not want to come up. Thank you.

B: still awaiting your address for return. Please advise. I'd like to be done with this as soon as possible. Many thanks, Violetta

SH: I mailed you the address and Even her phone number yesterday. If I don't get the dress tomorrow I won't be able to take it back. Thank you, Sally

B: You have not emailed me anything yesterday. You said in your last correspondence with me that you would have sent me address on Sunday but you didn't.I DIDN"T, repeat DIDN'T, receive ANYTHING from you yesterday and I check my email several times a day.If this is a clever trick to avoid returning an inappropriately advertised item, then know that I will not hesitate in opening a Paypal/Ebay dispute and I will not hesitate in leaving you a negative feedback.Please advise as soon as possible as this is getting ridiculous.Violetta

B: I just saw this [the email with the address in the city] in my Ebay inbox. It was clearly sent today NOT yesterday.

SH: Please cancel this transaction [trying to recover the fee ebay charged for the sale that didn't happen].

B: Happy to cancel transaction after I receive the refund.Many thanks Violetta

B: Please advise Re: refund

B: I really think that as a gesture of goodwill you should have refundd the entire amount (USD 74.95).i'd like to remind you that had you been accurate in your description there would have been no need to return the item so it is really cheap on your part to not refund postage.

PS. I still await for the transaction to be cancelled and wonder why I felt any sympathy at all for pregnant cheep Violetta?

Expensive cheese

2009-11-03T00:20:00.004-05:00

No matter how frequently and how carefully I try to cut my baby's nails, she manages to scratch herself. So for the most part of a 24 hour period, I keep her hands covered with special undershirts that have little mittens at the end (the proper name of this garment eludes me at the moment).

Whenever my baby's hands get released from their 'jails' they are a bit smelly. Last week, at the beginning of another round of let-baby's-hands-breathe, I apologized to the babysitter for baby's smelly hands and explained that I didn't wash them yet. But the babysitter wisely replied " No need to apologize. The baby smells like an expensive cheese...The smell is wonderful."

I instantly realized that she was right. I'm not a fan of expensive aged cheeses but everything about baby smells is quite delicious and wonderful. And incidentally, her nickname now is (Expensive) Cheese.

When I gave the baby her first official bath today, I told both of us that the cheese nickname may now have to be changed. But, I didn't change it just yet.

Proofreading

2009-10-29T15:38:00.002-04:00

Someone recently asked me to read to them some of my compositions. So I did. And discovered that whereas some of my compositions are easy reading, others I had to read twice ( and if I wasn't there, I won't be able to tell what the compositions were all about).

Moral of the story: forget the spellchecker and just proofread.

The teeth of a gifted horse

2009-10-25T12:17:00.000-04:00

One often wonders what goes on in people's heads when they choose to give a gift and then actually give the gift itself. Sometimes, the degree of an obligation to give the gift dictates the type of gift that's given. At times, it's the giver's personality, financial situations, closeness to the receiver of the gift, some combination of all factors, or some other reason that I can't think of now.

A few days ago we got a baby gift- one of our neighbors kindly gave us a Catimini (French. Expensive.) outfit. In size 2. And the top snap fell off as soon as the outfit was removed from the gift bag.

The conversation that followed a bit later included some of the following:

-How did you even accept the gift- you sit at home and don't open the door? (True statement, as I hibernate in my bedroom without opening the front door or answering my phone much.) What can I answer to that? I mistook my neighbor for my sister in law- something which neither one understood later. But once the door is open, it's rather difficult to say, Thanks for stopping by, but I don't accept any gifts, especially from you and especially something that I have to keep in my closet for the next two years AND remember to find it then and put it on my kid...

-The neighbor regifted this crap. It probably survived from one of her kids and it isn't worth much. We don't need any gifts in general and a gift like this in particular. Agreed. Most people regift and very few can do so gracefully...

-Why don't you go back to the neighbor and tell her that the snap fell off? Politely ask her where she got it and tell her you want to go and exchange it for a smaller size with a snap that would stay on for at least one day. I was embarrassed to admit that I'm too old for such tricks. Ten years ago I would've done it with a straight face but now I think it's better to donate this outfit or use it as a rag than go through the suggested routine.

-This gift reminds me of the one we got from your friend for Eh. She gave us a baby monitor when we lived in a rather small 1 bedroom apartment with the baby's converted-from-closet-with-a-window-room right next to ours. Yea, that useful gift came from a friend who lived in a similarly small apartment. And, she presented it as a gift from her whole family...If nothing else, these gifts are definitely memorable.

-Mommy, are we going to give this back to our neighbor? [Dear Gd, we shouldn't have such conversations in front of our kids! ] No, of course not! The new baby is going to wear it when she gets older. I just forgot to bring it to her room...

So I brought the bag with the outfit upstairs and kept it on my desk long enough to remember to write this post. Now I have to decide if it's ok to put it in the bag with some used clothes that I'm giving to a friend. After all, it's a Catimini.

Belly button...

2009-10-21T23:38:00.003-04:00

Or rather the remaining piece of the umbilical cord Fell off yesterday, when Baby was exactly two weeks old:)

She's officially an individual with just her belly button to remind me that we were once One.

New Addition

2009-10-09T12:38:00.002-04:00

She didn't arrive after hearing the shofar on Rosh Hashana...
She didn't arrive after fasting and praying on Yom Kippur...
She didn't arrive on either first OR second day of Sukkot...
And then, she was here on the second day of chol hamoed- bright and early, 4:15 in the morning- my brand new Baby girl:)

Bitter Sweet

2009-10-01T22:42:00.002-04:00

Tonight, even though there was lots of tasty food in the house, I had the urge to get dinner from my favorite Carlos and Gabby. At the last moment, I decided to eat in, instead of taking it to go. Then, I was compelled to buy seltzer, just in case all that good food won't agree with me.
And then I saw someone with whom I was very close 15 years ago, a great friend with whom I lost touch even before she got married.

The reconnection was instant. It was as if we've never lost touch. Then, in a short conversation on our way back to our cars ( we both parked around-the-corner, one behind the other), she told me she was in the process of getting divorced. She didn't need my sympathy, my words of comfort. But this bit of news added bitterness to our happy reunion. There was my always down to earth, fun friend who always found a positive spin on things, just telling me simply that sometimes things don't turn out the way you wish they did.

My Garden - a long overdue update

2009-09-23T23:21:00.026-04:00

After I posted a picture of plant cemetery, I actually took care of my little patch of soil which I proudly call my garden. Here are some long overdue pictures.

Happy Anniversary

2009-09-22T23:52:00.002-04:00

Today is my off-the-boat anniversary. And though I always know it in my heart ( and put it on my work calendar for an official celebration), I wasn't at work to see it on the calendar so I wasn't the first one to congratulate my family...

My mom and my sister don't need any reminders and my sister expressed my family's combined sentiment so well that I'll just quote her:

"Happy Anniversary to our family! Thank you, our beautiful country, for giving us your shelter, your citizenship, and the ability to live as free human beings! G-d bless you and keep you safe!"
Amen.

Memorial Service in a Nursing Home

2009-09-18T00:30:00.006-04:00

Today at work, there was a memorial service for all the residents who recently passed away. It was organized by the sister of Bobbie, one of the diseased, and a good chunk of the service focused on Bobbie.

Bobbie passed away suddenly and very much unexpectedly. One day she was walking around and the next day she came up on the census as an 'expiration in-house'. Her sister brought a few of Bobbie's childhood pictures -both of them together, Bobbie happily munching something sitting in a high-chair, Bobbie in her father's arms, Bobbie proudly standing next to her mother. The sister told a few anecdotes about Bobbie and then asked others to speak.

Some staff and relatives of other residents spoke. There were a few times when I wanted to say a few words but in the end I stopped myself. What would I say? That Bobbie had an incredible memory and remembered me and my name after not seeing me for 2 years? That Bobbie wanted to be popular and pretty so she frequently said 'I hate you because you hate me!' and wore bright lipstick smudged in the general location of her lips? Or that Bobbie very much wanted to have a baby and/or be skinny (she was) at the same time and would often inform people that she was pregnant or on a diet? Or that Bobbie missed her sister (apparently estranged) and wanted to leave the nursing home saying almost every day "I'm leaving today. My sister is coming to pick me up!" Or that I found this memorial service to be a too-little-too-late-compensation of Bobbie's sister for a relationship that went sour for whatever reason. But all that would be just me passing judgement , not me giving tribute to Bobbie - unnecessary and somewhat out of place.

Instead, I listened to Bobbie's neighbors' memories of her...
One said succinctly: " I remember Bobbie. She wanted to marry me." It was his wishful thinking but a memory of Bobbie he firmly made up in his head.
A female resident said that she remembered that Bobbie used to have a very pretty bracelet.
And a resident who was really close to Bobbie came up and started telling a bizarre monologue in a flat sing-song:
This is how the story goes... Bobbie and I met in school when I was 4 and she was 3...We became great friends...And I miss her very much...

And he just walked away. But his strange sing-song was a true tribute to Bobbie and the last 3 speeches expressed how most of us felt - we missed Bobbie.

SiM's first day in school

2009-09-09T22:51:00.002-04:00

Today was SiM's official first day in play group. He was both enthusiastic and hesitant - happily packing his knapsack and saying that he is not going to school. Eh even told him a few times that he likes school, that he is going to play with lots of toys and he already knows his morah (teacher) [he met her last year when he 'walked' Eh to school every day].

Finally, Eh declared that she'll take SiM to school together with me. SiM happily put his mitzva note into his pocket, demanded to have his knapsack placed on his back, and off to play group we went.

SiM was the first one to arrive ( if you don't count teacher's grandson who was visiting for a day). He was just a tad hesitant entering into the play group's yard. However, he eagerly produced his mitzva note from his pocket and gave it to the teacher and was heading towards some toys in the back. Then Eh said that she's going to stay and play with him ' a little bit' and SiM went to sit down at a little table and play play dough with Eh and teacher's grandson ( thankfully, since it was quite empty, the teacher allowed Eh to stay for a few minutes).

When I came home from work and asked SiM how his first day in school was, he proudly informed me that he didn't cry. When asked if he enjoyed playing with toys and meeting new kids he said he did. SiM also confirmed that he is going to go to school tomorrow. And for the grand finale, he showed me a shofar drawing that he colored and decorated with confetti in school.

I felt relieved, content, and proud. Tomorrow is Eh's orientation and I hope and pray she'll continue to enjoy school like she did until now. And she'll come home from her first day of school with lots of positive things to say.

ESL, Ulpan, whatever- just do it!

2009-08-18T23:07:00.004-04:00

On Shabbat, Eh went to visit one of her friends. There, we met another little girl, ' a cousin from Eretz Yisroel'. This was exciting to me and I didn't hesitate to mention that Eh's cousin from Israel was visiting as well.

While the kids were playing, I asked Eh's friend's mom if she knew how to say 'slides' in Hebrew. She said that unfortunately she didn't speak a word of Hebrew. Then, I turned to cousin-from-Eretz-Yisroel's mom and asked her the same question.
Her reply? A proud "I don't know. I live in an American neighborhood and I don't need to know Hebrew..."

I jokingly told her that she's like the Russians on Brighton who live in the country for 20+ years and can barely speak a coherent sentence in English. She agreed with a serious look on her face.

I let the subject drop but it bothered me long enough to actually post about it.

What's up with all these people who don't bother to learn the language of the country where they live?! The babysitters who want to teach you and your kids how to speak Spanish instead of trying to learn from you OR your kids how to speak English... The cleaning ladies whose vocabularies year after year after year don't change much and include something like 'bounty, Windex, Ajax (pronounced a-Hoks), fantastic, lot-of-work-more-money'...The students and their families who pride themselves in learning in 'Eretz Yisroel' yet can't express themselves well enough in a grocery store and may ask for 'chicken's underwear' instead of 'chicken bottoms'?!

And there are many many more examples but unfortunately I must get to bed or else. In conclusion, I say the foreigners should drop the pride in their ignorance and attempt to learn a little. I hear it may delay the onset of senile dementia...

My big boy

2009-08-04T23:47:00.003-04:00

Today, when the babysitter was saying her good byes for the day, SiM said bye and then said
" thanks Molly for taking me to park". It warmed my heart and I thought that he really is "I not baby, I big boy!".

I love him but he bothers me...

2009-08-03T08:43:00.002-04:00

Thanks for your advanced comments. It was an experiment in typing and blogging during a meeting (with a somewhat undesireable outcome but that's what experiments are all about). Now, to the post...

Yesterday, Eh was trying to choose her PJs when SiM came over and started asking her " do you want this one or that one?". Eh ignored SiM for a bit but since inattention from Eh only resulted in continuous replay of the question from SiM, Eh finally turned around and gently moved SiM away from her closet. SiM started crying, insulted by Eh's obvious disregard for his company.

I picked up SiM to comfort him ( and get his PJs) and politely told Eh that SiM was just trying to help her and there was no need to move him in that fashion.

Eh stopped what she was doing, looked me straight in the eyes and said:
"Mommy, I love him but he is bothering me! I'm trying to choose my pajamas and he keeps asking me 'do you want this one or that one?'. I can't choose like that."

And yet again, I was reminded to practice and not just preach.

Motivational Speeches

2009-07-20T20:21:00.002-04:00

In the morning, since SiM wasn't feeling well, I told him he won't be going to camp. Apparently, he didn't hear the whole sentence because he responded with " I don't want to go to camp".
"Why?"
"I don't like it!" was SiM's short reply.

A couple of minutes later, during my daily creative-writing moment, aka composition of mitzva notes I overheard the following conversation between Eh and SiM.
S: We are writing you mitzva notes for camp.
E: I don't like camp.
S: Why? Camp is So much fun!

Tshuva

2009-07-17T19:13:00.006-04:00

In the nursing homes, every so often, one comes upon a resident who has ' no know family'. Sometimes, the resident's family members don't want anything to do with the resident, sometimes, it's the other way around. Then there are other reasons, but the result it always the same. When the resident moves on to the next world, his/her only family is nursing home staff.

A few days ago, a resident who was 101 ( one hundred and one) years old passed away suddenly, overnight. One day, he was wheeling himself around in a wheelchair and the next morning he came up on the list of expirations. This resident had no known family.

When the social worker announced the date and time of his funeral, I told myself I'll go. I thought the man must've done something right in his life if he got to live til 101. And, I also remembered how I missed a funeral of another resident and the regret I felt about it. This was my opportunity to make things right, my chance to do tshuva.

On the day of the funeral, the social worker reminded everyone of the place and time, 12pm, as well as 'he had no family' detail. I relayed the message to all my colleagues and when one asked if I plan on going I said "Of course. You can come with me, if you'd like."

At around 11:45, all of my coworkers showed up with fried chicken for lunch. My pizza-lunch-plans quickly became an urge to eat hot chicken wings, and off I drove (noticing in passing that a social worker and a nursing supervisor went out for a lunch date).

I took the wings to go as I had to do some erev shabbat shopping. As I headed back to work at 12:40, happily munching on the fries, I suddenly remembered the 12:00 funeral, good 20 minutes away. A horrible realization that I may have missed it struck me. It would take 20 minutes to get there, I have an appointment with someone @ 1 pm, the funeral may be over by then... I didn't really have a relationship with this resident like I did with the one from last year. But did I make the same careless mistake twice?

I decided to go for it, praying that I won't get pulled over for speeding. Thank Gd, after an uneventful ride I arrived to the parking lot of the funeral home. It was empty except for one car that was pulling out. Was I too late?

"You are late! But he's still there, go in, ' a nurse told me as she drove off. I think he was Jewish but his funeral took place in a catholic funeral home ( with all the consequences). I walked into a room, empty, except for an open casket. I paid my respects and said a prayer for a man who lived to be 101. And I walked back to my car feeling that I finally did right by my friend.

How quickly we forget

2009-07-15T23:18:00.001-04:00

A week ago (7/7/09 to be exact) one of my relatives returned to the States after long 'religious' travels all over the world, the last stop of which was the great country of Ukraine.
It's possible that one of the few readers that I may have actually hails from that great country and still has lots of fond memories associated with it.

My relative and family had lots of fond memories of that great country, too. However, as they observed strict dietary laws even in Ukraine, they seem to be delighted by things and foods that stopped exciting me looooong time ago (can it be 20 years?).

For one thing, they couldn't get enough of those mediocre tasting chocolate vanilla ice cream, aka Dixie Cups. Naively I asked them if they like such ice cream. They just said that in Ukraine, they used to get dairy ( chalav israel) ice cream one a year, for Shavuot ( holiday) and to eat ice cream whenever was a real treat! A real treat to eat Klein's Dixie Cups!

How many times did I pass by Dixie Cups without even thinking of them as Ice Cream? I'd be embarrassed to admit. However, the Dixie Cups are my new symbol of how quickly we get used to something that's good and forget how good we have it.

Happy Birthday, America! 2009

2009-07-04T23:02:00.003-04:00

Since it was shabbat, we didn't bbq.
Since I didn't think yesterday, Eh's patriotic dress was all stained ( from trying it on and keeping it on for the day:)) and not fit to be worn today.
Since I didn't have the insight to try it on before, my American flag bandanna didn't want to stay on my head.
Since I couldn't find my blue beads, my red-white-and-blue outfit became a red hat and white outfit combo ( which got me compliments for bravery -wearing all white with young kids around) but did little to bring my patriotic spirit across.
However, the American flag is proudly displayed in front of my door, I hear the fireworks from my window, and still feel the Independence day excitement in my heart!
Happy birthday, America!

Watch your mouth

2009-06-30T23:06:00.004-04:00

I was driving with the kids on one of narrow local streets when suddenly the car in front of me stopped. Just like that, in the middle of the road. I patiently waited as, apparently, the driver had to receive something from an apologetic-looking pedestrian. Then the car continued standing in the middle of the street.

I'm all for stopping if and when needed but kindly move to a side! So, I honked. The car moved forward a bit and stopped. I honked again, a bit longer, more inpatient honk. The car inched forward again. BUT not to either one of the sides. Then I just didn't let go of the horn. It was passed kids' bedtime, I felt exhausted and annoyed. MOVE!

Finally, the car inched a bit more AND slightly to the left. And I was finally able to squeeze by. When I was finally able to see the driver (some oblivious local woman of unidentifiable age) I yelled into my closed window "Move over!" and then against my better judgement but with lots of emotion "Stupid!".

Then we stopped by a red light and Eh asked " what did you say mommy?"
"I told the car to move over so we can pass..." I answered hoping that my Jewish instrumentals were loud enough during my 'conversation' with a fellow motorist.
"Why did you say that?"
"I wanted her to move over so we can pass..."
"Why?"
"I just wanted to pass..."
"Why did you say 'stupid'?"

Oops... "It was a mistake. I'm sorry. I said 'stupid' by mistake..."

In response, Eh just laughed.

First day in summer camp

2009-06-29T23:47:00.004-04:00

For a few months, when SiM, together with the babysitter, took Eh to her 'school', he asked to stay there. But, every time SiM was told that he was too young and would have to come back next year. Subsequently, when asked, he'd always say " I go cool [school] next year".

All this, and SiM's enjoyment of company of his peers and Eh's friends, made me sign him up for summer day camp.

The whole last week SiM enthusiastically talked about going to school ( as the camp was presented to SiM). This morning, SiM asked to get dressed right away, before breakfast. As soon as I packed his little knapsack, he asked me to put it on him [mommy, how you put this?], and thus, he proudly walked around the house. He even wanted to be changed with his knapsack on.

On the way to camp, every time I asked if SiM is excited about going to gan (camp), he eagerly answered yes. When we approached the camp, I told him that he'll have to say bye to me, his sister, and the babysitter and be in camp by himself. He obliged by saying bye to all of us and started up the stairs to the camp by himself. When we walked in he looked slightly cautious but still optimistic. I showed the counselor where his mitzva note and $ for tzdaka were. Then, a counselor picked SiM up and started carrying him away. My kid gave our a horribly loud 'mommy' and optimism was instantly replaced with fear.

As I quickly walked away with my baby desperately calling me in the background, my heart sank and thoughts that maybe he's too young for camp, etc rushed to my head. Eh asked why SiM cried and I calmly explained that it takes a while for a person to get used to new things.

When it was Eh's turn to go to camp, I stayed with her for ~5 minutes ( and the babysitter for another 15) so she can warm up to the place. Then, resisting the temptation x2 to check on SiM, I went to work.

When I came home, I asked the kids if they enjoyed camp today. Both answered with a happy yes. Eh reported that she met one of her 'classmates' in camp and though she enjoyed swimming, one of the pools had cold water in it.

When asked what he did in camp, SiM answered " I meet new friends." Big sister also asked him if he cried a lot. 'No. I cried a teeny tiny bit." Whew. I guess he is ready for camp after all.

Why I shouldn't blog in the evenings

2009-06-23T22:48:00.003-04:00

The lights are on but nobody's home. For quite some time now I've been so fatigued (though not SO fatigued as to go to sleep before 11ish PM) that I felt I can't write anything decent, or even 1/2 decent. But I didn't want to forget some of the things that I wanted to write about so I saved them as drafts.

A few evenings ago I felt more awake than usual and decided to make one of the drafts a post. But all I did was change the title. Then I realized I'm in no writing shape, so I closed the computer and went to do something else.

The following morning I had the following conversation with a friend:
F: Your short post generated comments.
I: Which post?
F: From last night.
I: Facebook update?
F: Blog.
I: The birthday one?
F: Wedding.
I: ( In disbelief and a bit horrified) That was a draft and I didn't publish it!
F: Well, it got two comments already...

I rest my case.

Should I care

2009-06-14T22:18:00.001-04:00

went to a friend's wedding. was disappointed to see some old 'friends'

My baby's a big boy

2009-06-11T23:14:00.003-04:00

For a few weeks now, my 'baby' became a 'big boy'.

"Are you my baby?"

"No, I big boy!"

"You little monkey?"

"No, I big boy."

"What's your name?"

"Big boy...(though he knows his first, middle, and last name)"

Being a big boy comes with certain privileges - using the potty, eating cereal with milk, wearing pjs without feet:) However, I didn't introduce the idea of a 'big boy' bed as my big girl made me realize that the longer a kid stays in the crib, the more chances you have of sleeping with fewer interruptions...

My big boy turned 2 a few days ago. He liked the presents hubby and I got for him. But I think he appreciated more the presents he got from his grandmas.

For SiM's birthday 'party' we went to the Prospect Park Zoo where SiM fed and petted the goats and the sheep, and even milked a cow:) The birthday celebration concluded with eating of SiM's birthday cake (supplied by grandma) and SiM loving the cake and tasting the candle.

My baby is already two...

The new cat on the block

2009-06-10T20:26:00.003-04:00

I don't know about you, but I pretty much know all the stay cats who roam near my house. I even used to feed them my cholent (until I saw 2 huge raccoons in my backyard in January).

A couple of weeks ago I noticed a newcomer. He was different from all other cats-very scrawny, with dull looking fur. He looked so pitiful, I put out some gifilte fish that night. And every time I saw him, I felt pity for him.

Yesterday, while my sister and I were sipping tea on my 'front porch', I saw the new cat pass by. He became a topic of our conversation and suddenly my sis put words to my feelings. This cat looked so pitiful and disturbing because even stray cats here, in America (Brooklyn?) look well fed.

Something good to keep in mind before complaining about tough economic times...

An antisemite next door...

2009-06-04T23:43:00.004-04:00

I've been patronising the local nail salon for the past few years. I even know the names of the owner and a couple of the workers and wave hi to them whenever I just pass by.

Today, I came home early enough to pick up Eh and go for a mommy-and-me manicures. While in there, I decided to 'shape' my eyebrows as well. And right before my turn some teenage Jewish girl (or was she possibly in her 20s) paid $14 worth of services with a credit card. The owner made a big deal about that transaction -'we get 85c from dollar, next time bring cash', etc.

I thought that in such cases she shouldn't accept credit cards and followed one of the 'cosmetologists' to the back to get my eyebrows done. A couple of minutes later, apparently as soon as the credit-card-paying-girl walked out, the owner said "$14 pay with credit card, less tip. should bring cash. Jewish!" and some patron (later observed to be of African descent) responded " yea, that's how they get rich..." The conversation continued in the same tones for a few minutes.

I asked the cosmetologist taking care of my eyebrows, who also serviced the credit-card-paying-girl, if she wasn't tipped by the girl. And unless I grossly misunderstood the thick accent, she was tipped, from the same credit card. I also mentioned to her that the conversation in the front 'was not nice'. To her credit, the cosmetologist looked embarrassed.

As soon as I was released from the eyebrow shaping, I took my kid by the hand (who the whole time patiently waited to have to nails polished), paid for my eyebrows in cash ( leaving a cash tip for self and the kid before me), said that I no longer wish to paint mine or my daughter's nails in that place, explained to the owner in one G-rated sentence why I was leaving, and left.

I learned from a very young age that my nation is not a popular one. But until today, I still cannot believe the extent of stupidity of those displaying their dislike of my people...

#17 and I should start learning from my kids

2009-05-25T21:41:00.002-04:00

A few days ago I noticed #17 on its way out (R upper molar). I squealed with delight and Eh immediately demanded SiM show off his new tooth, assisting him in opening his mouth...Oh, to be young again.

Today, after dinner, hubby was using a toothpick. Eh requested to have one. SiM said he wants one, too.

Hubby: It's only for adults who have teeth. Kids can get hurt using toothpicks.
SiM: I have teeth [priceless display of his bite].
Eh: No, you don't have a lot of teeth, I do [grimacy smile]!
I: SiM has a lot of teeth already [one must defend a kid who has 17th tooth on its way] but toothpicks are not for kids. Let's have a dessert...

Before dinner, the kids were playing in front of the house when SiM noticed one of the staring kids and followed the kid up her stairs. He followed it with a short conversation with the kid and her mom. All this followed by me having an actual conversation with the mom ( who incidentally asked me if SiM can talk - good thing he didn't realize that he wasn't understood). Then, Eh joined the excitement and conversed with the mom, too. Maybe soon, the kids would converse with us, too.

Lesson: Don't be too proud to learn from your kids? and remember that Gd helps those who help themselves?

Welcome to our block

2009-05-19T21:44:00.003-04:00

For a while now I've been tempted to write a 'welcome to our block' series. Yet, I must contain myself as one of my neighbors occasionally reads this stuff. And since this post is quite benign, I decided to go for it.

B'H I live on this block for close to 2.5 years. There is a family man who lives a couple of houses down from me whose voice I haven't heard in all this time. He first left an impression on me when a couple of years ago, my car got stuck on the ice and this gentleman walked right by, got into his car, and happily drove off.

Well today I was coming home from a store, happily chatting with my kids while pushing their double stroller. I was about to cross the street when this gentleman pulled his car up right in front of us. I tried to move forward. He did the same. I politely stopped, waiving for him to go ahead. He stopped also, for some unknown reason parking at a hydrant quite a distance from his house). Since he didn't shut off the ignition, I felt compelled to tell him "we are crossing the street," in case he chose to start driving as soon as I stepped down on the street.

The man shocked me when he answered "good luck". I told him that we'll do our best and giggled at our first conversation. Only when I was walking up my stairs did I notice his wife pulling out of their driveway. The gentleman, it seems, politely gave her room to maneuver her vehicle.

This incident may be enlightening regarding his kids' affinity to stare. Though, as always, it may just be my overactive imagination at work.

A new tooth

2009-05-10T23:02:00.002-04:00

During dinner, Eh whispered a secret to me. At first, I admit I didn't understand much, so I just "oh, yeah"d her. She knew that her secret deserved a better response than that. So she repeated her secret a bit louder. And to my amazement and slight anxiety I've learned that Eh is going to get a new tooth first because her top tooth is shaking. I checked it but didn't feel much. Hubby, on the other hand, confirmed that Eh's secret is a reality.

Apparently, that exciting for Eh event happened while she was on her outing with her favorite aunt.

My emotions re: this development are still mixed.

No more naps

2009-05-07T23:30:00.002-04:00

It's been a week since my big kid stopped napping in the middle of the day. It took some adjustment on my part (esp when it came to shabbat nap) but all in all, I'm enjoying our new schedule. I'm free to do as I please by around 8pm (unless of course SiM refuses to cooperate).

What do I do with all the time that I now have?

I am my neighbor

2009-05-06T16:22:00.002-04:00

I have a neighbor who, when parked on the street, likes to repark his car closer and closer to her house. I used to think it a bit peculiar yet somewhat admirable -most people are too lazy for that kind of exercise.

Yesterday, I parked my car across the street from my house. About an hour later, when I came to unload the trunk, I noticed the same parking spot available on my side of the street. I ran like a woman who woke up a few minutes after the alternate-size-parking-street-cleaning-hours went into effect to repark my car. Once I unloaded the trunk and started walking to my house did I realize that I've joined my neighbor's exercise group.

Why I like working in health care

2009-05-04T16:59:00.003-04:00

Today during rounds one of the big cheeses with a nursing degree made two comments. I thought these comments were remarkable enough to relay them to the rest of the department and to post on this blog.
1-"This man keeps having problems with his eye. He should see an ENT- an eye specialist."
2-"We have a policy for visitors and staff with flu-like symptoms. Plus, I read that they have an antibiotic for it already."
'It's a virus,' commented self and another nurse.
"Yes, so they have the antibiotic for it."

Hope so do you enjoy these comments as much as my colleagues and I did. And maybe you can even appreciate why I love working in health care. (Imagine if the health care was socialized? The fun would never end!)

Bad advice

2009-04-27T23:38:00.003-04:00

My daughter was sick for a few days and I allowed her to fall asleep in my bed. She requested the same privilege a few days later, after she thank Gd felt better.

It was well past her bedtime and my patience was running low. So I told her I don't care where she sleeps as long as she stays in her room. I even suggested she put one of her pillows on the floor and sleep there. I heard noises from her room for some time. But I decided that it would be best if I just let her fall asleep without any further attention/distraction from me.

A couple of hours later, I was walking to my room with a cup of tea and noticed her door was wide open. And as I approached the door to close it, I almost spilled my tea on my firstborn, who lay sleeping in the doorway.

I guess as a parents I should keep in mind that kids to listen sometimes...

On Gardening

2009-04-26T21:57:00.002-04:00

When I was around 10 years old, my friend and I started collecting house plants. We used to take leaves, shoots, stems from any new plant we saw and plant them in our respective houses. We (not just my friend, but I, too) got so good at it, that at one point we each had more than 30 plants thriving in our houses.

Fast forward to now. I have 3 plants. An African violet and some small succulent plant are in the kitchen. The strategic placement of these plants on the left of the sink unfortunately did nothing for their well being. The are alive because they are tough and by the mercy of the cleaning lady and the babysitter. (I help them out periodically which I'm sure is better than no help at all?)

My third plant is a spider. They don't come any tougher. I try to take it outdoors during the warm months so it gets lots of sun and strength. A third of its leaves usually makes it through the winter... I took it outside earlier today. Hopefully, it's on the rebound as I type.

As far as outdoor greenery... A few years in a row, I used to have luscious grass around April. Joined by colorful flowers some time mid-May. All yellow around mid-July when I would inadvertently forget to water them. Believe it or not, it only takes a couple of hot summer NY days of water deprivation and the plants go limp, often irreversibly so...

Anywho, all of the above was just an intro to the following exciting news. My front lawnette is now ready to receive flowers ( and possibly tomatoes?)! The tombstones, together with the dead flowers and dry leaves, were respectfully relocated into trash bags.

Hope to report more good news any day or sooner!

Cemetery

2009-04-23T22:13:00.009-04:00

Most people took care of their gardens and front lawns by now.

But if you are a procrastinator, your garden may just look like a flower cemetery with unkempt tombstones sadly sitting in the dirt.

Credits: brother

I'm not from Moscow

2009-04-21T19:52:00.003-04:00

I was standing in the check- in line in the airport with my kids in a stroller, when some grandma stood on my left with an obvious attempt to cut in. I politely told her that I have two carts full of suitcases besides the stroller but grandma didn't seem to budge. When the line moved and grandma (periodically joined by younger generation who brought in luggage) tried to wedge in, I again said that I was in line in front of her. The man behind whom I stood confirmed that.

Grandma's reaction? In an Eastern European accented voice she told me "It's ok. Since I'm not from Moscow, you can push ahead!"

Normally, I'd respond in kind. But my immediate reaction was "how does she know?"... A second too late I realized that she didn't, she was just trying to insult me. But the moment was gone. Well, that and her advanced age. So I just told her that I didn't want to miss my flight, either.

When hubby and luggage joined me, I couldn't stop laughing recalling this story. And I also wondered that people don't seem to need much to be snobs. Who knows, maybe the senior thought that Nazi Hungary was much more superior to communist Russia? Who am I to tell...

Kids Holiday clothes

2009-04-02T23:39:00.013-04:00

I do most of my shopping online. Convenient, easy, and I can 'hold on' to something and 'put it back' on the shelves lots of times with not much effort. Plus, the ease of comparing stocks of different stores.

Gymboree.com Gap.com JanieandJack.com , and Thechildrensplace.com are not in my favorite links only because I enjoy typing the words out to complete the pleasure of my shopping experience.

I didn't really like Gap's selection this season...

Some of my choices from Gymboree (though after 3 years of devoted attention I cheated on Gymboree and didn't buy anything for my kids from there for Pesach. Possible explanation- while I was comparing/contrasting, I missed the sale):

My actual purchases from Janie and Jack (I didn't miss the sale):

The Children's Place (I somehow caved and actually bought these in the store):

[I'm still not sure about the pants but I think they are 'growing' on me].

I'm a bit embarrassed to admit that I also bought a few items in stores that begged me to walk into them this past week while I was out buying lunch and/or groceries.

All and all, the only thing that's more fun than buying kids' clothes is seeing these clothes on your models, still clean at the end of a day:)

A useful sign

2009-03-31T21:50:00.004-04:00

I was expecting a visit from my sister today around 6:30. When the door bell rang around 6:45 I opened the door right away, without checking first who was behind it.

Right behind the door stood a presentable middle aged lady with a suitcase. She smiled, greeted me, and said that her name was Yvonne. I smiled back waiting for an explanation for the suitcase. Yvonne just kept smiling. I asked her if she was looking for someone. And she said, still smiling, "I'm the baby nurse."

Yippy. Though SiM still insists on calling himself 'baby' ( except for the times when he uses the potty and proudly calls himself a 'big boy'), I didn't recall hiring anyone to watch him in the evenings. And since the date was still March 31, I didn't think hubby played an early April fool's joke on me.

"For the new born baby," added Yvonne. And as she said that my eyes caught a big blue balloon-like sign across the street. Whew! I directed Yvonne to the signed door while she apologized profusely for writing down a wrong address. She even asked me if the new mom is back home. " Not sure, just saw the sign, " I said. And as she crossed the street, I tried to explain to the kids who our unexpected visitor was.

Birthday Party - a personal ramble

2009-03-29T21:58:00.007-04:00

Whenever I have conflicts with self and the stubborn voice inside tells something opposite of the polite/proper/necessary/civilized/etc voice, I know I should always listen to the stubborn voice. That voice usually takes good care of me when the civilized voice takes care of everybody else.

Tonight I attended a kid's bday party hosted by a one-time great friend. I didn't listen to the little egotistical voice. So instead I had 45 minutes to mull in my head how disappointing our meeting was as I drove home.

I tried to sort out what exactly ticked me off. I know it wasn't the fact that I didn't get the memo re: >3.5 heeled shoes - self and some senior citizen were the only 2 grown up women with flats on. When this was pointed out to the friend, I was told ' you know how my parties are.' 'Now I know' was all I can say.

Maybe that was it. I didn't know what I got myself into. Having an inkling is not quite the same thing as stepping right into something. And it's rather hard to find someone who wants to exchange small talk with you when you don't have the uniform on. I did succeed to have a quite pleasant conversation with the senior citizen (not once mentioning the only thing we had in common). As for my friend - we barely exchanged a few words. I know the hosts are usually busy, but that busy?

I didn't know how her parties were, and I no longer knew her either. Even if I put on my 4" Stewart Weitzmans (the skinniest and highest heels I've got), she and I wouldn't have much to say besides our mutual admiration for each other's kids and our assurances how much we missed each other/hope to see each other soon.

Another one of life's disappointments to note and get over with. And a lesson to listen to the little voice, politely excuse self from attending bday parties, and send gifts by mail.

Addendum (March 30th): I just got an email from Banana Republic with their 'most wanted' list. Apparently, 4" heels are in. Back to the cave I go.

Cleaning up and the cleaning lady

2009-03-29T00:10:00.003-04:00

I try to clean up the house a bit before the cleaning lady arrives. Not that I'm embarrassed of my mess as such. I just want to be able to find some essentials which may be lost of months after the cleaning lady leaves.

Today I decided to forgo the usual clean up, and do some pesach and spring cleaning instead. The results were as follows:
-I collected 2 contractor's (big garbage) bags worth of clothing for donations. This did not include kids' clothes which I try to give away to friends and family. It included some (but not yet all) clothes in sizes I don't even remember myself wearing hidden in the depths of my linen closet. It also included some sweaters which I missed in the beginning of winter and also discovered in the bowels of my very spacious linen closet.

-Discovery of 2 shopping bags of fleishig storage containers, old unopened mail (TG no bills), and some professional publications. My cleaning lady who likes neatness as well as cleanliness apparently didn't mind all that being in before mentioned linen closet.

-4 empty kids' shoe boxes neatly stacked in the coat closet. She used to ask me if I need certain seemingly unnecessary items before discarding them, now my cleaning lady just neatly piles them away.

-2 smallish bags of clothing I purchased for my nieces. Thankfully, they are still the right size, but if I don't mail them within a week, they'll be for a wrong season (mailing things efficiently is a bit of an issue).

-2 Elmo costumes carelessly thrown in a pile on top of some shoes. Not sure if I should credit the cleaning lady or the babysitter. Either way, they were more efficient than me (even if not neat).

-A pair of new light corduroy pants in SiM's size. Just what I've been looking for! and perfect for Pesach.

-A huge Toys R Us shopping bag with miscellaneous stuff from my car, some old mail, and a fleishig container in the back of the coat closet (cleaning lady?).

-A throw pillow and 3 kids' blankets in the coat closet. Suspect the cleaning lady but can't say for sure.

Got to love spring cleaning!

Doctor's visit

2009-03-26T22:44:00.003-04:00

Usually, Eh and SiM start making unhappy noises 50 feet away from the pediatricians office. However, last week Eh was uncharacteristically quiet (read she didn't cry) and SiM followed suit throughout MD visit. They both let the doctor listen to their lungs, check their ears, eyes, nose, and throat without as much as a peep (They didn't get weighed but I'm sure they wouldn't handled that, too).

On Tuesday, because I couldn't take my congestion anymore (read-parched lips, no voice, and nose used purely for decorative purpose) I decided to go to a doctor to finally get some antibiotics (an unfortunate necessity since I'm no longer in close contact with all my former MD/PA/NP friends). SiM asked to go with me.

He did ok in the waiting room. He asked to go to the car once we entered the exam room. But after my MD walked into the room, SiM started observing everything with fascination (while I hoped my blood pressure didn't go up just from being in the doctor's office as a patient). And the kicker- SiM accepted MD's hand and they walked out of the exam room ahead of me.

And today, my nose is functioning almost as new. Thanks Gd!

Shabbat guests aka the tales from CNN

2009-03-25T21:38:00.005-04:00

Last week we had to guests on shabbat lunch - a wholesale distributor (wh) and a financial analyst (fa).

B'H, no one was allergic to the first course, the salads also went with moderate success, and even cholent didn't disappoint.

Naturally, the conversation drifted to the economy. And all the money flushed down the toilet (the process euphemistically called 'the bailout'). I think I mentioned that some of these companies should file for bankruptcy. FA agreed, WH started to protest saying that it would be unfair to millions of people who'd become unemployed if a company like GM would go bankrupt.
FA politely tried to explain the process of how a corporation files for bankruptcy. WH again expressed his concern for the working class. FA politely pointed out that a big corporation like GM should not be confused with a local bakery. Local bakery goes out of business - people lose jobs; GM files for bankruptcy - restructuring happens, most people keep their jobs.

WH: But CNN says that if GM would go bankrupt millions of people would lose their jobs.

Here even I couldn't take it and politely pointed out to WH that just because CNN reports something, that something does not become absolute or even vague truth.

The conversation became a bit heated ( and unshabosdik) after that. Neither FA, a subject matter expert, nor I, an observer who pointed out that just because a story is reported doesn't make the story true, can stand in a way of a CNN chasid's economics.

In the end we agreed to disagree. And five days later I still wonder why anyone still perceives CNN as a source of useful information.

I'll be wearing my work clothes, part 2

2009-03-21T22:28:00.002-04:00

The other day, a nurse supervisor who typically wears street clothes (and lab coats on special occasions like visits from Dep't of Health reps) came in dressed in all-white uniform.

The natural question begged itself. So I didn't hesitate to ask if this supervisor, like most of us, neglected to do his laundry on time.

The man was much more pragmatic than that. Apparently, he had to go to court later that day. And he learned the hard way that if he showed up in court wearing his uniform, there was a possibility he'd get a chance to mention that he is a nurse. A nice nurse serving the local community. It seemed to work in his favor before and he was counting on it to work again. He just looked very funny but apparently it was worth it.

And there I thought that showing up in uniform outside of workplace was in bad taste...

Results to follow.

Meanalls

2009-03-17T23:45:00.004-04:00

Today, when reporting to his aunt what he was doing SiM said "me eating meat balls".

I didn't make him meat balls for dinner! I made 'meanalls' and that's what I served everyone.

Before I know it, he'll start saying 'I'...

I miss my neighbors

2009-03-16T22:13:00.003-04:00

Soon after we moved to the block we discovered that the middle aged couple who lived in a house not far from ours wasn't that friendly ( not the only ones, but the post is dedicated to them). They didn't really answer our greetings, and I remember hubby practicing assertiveness ( or just amusing himself) but saying "good morning" a few times until he's get an answer back.

Well, this couple moved. And into their house moved a family with a whole bunch of little kids. Those kids stare. And blatantly refuse all our attempts (mine and my kids) at friendship. The parental greetings are also scarce...

Well, yesterday I passed by a house that's rumored to be that to which the middle-aged-formerly-my-neighborly couple moved to. And to my surprise and disgust (or maybe just guilt?) I realized that I miss them.

With a regrettable delay I realized that I prefer middle aged snobs to younger (snobbish?) starers...

By the way, is starer a word?

A Perfect smile

2009-03-12T22:43:00.004-04:00

Apparently SiM's bottom left canine sneaked up while I wasn't paying attention. And now SiM has a perfect smile (the canines are in different stages of arrival but the smile is perfect non the less).

He also uses his new teeth for more practical purposes. On Monday, the first work day after daylight savings time, my alarm (SiM) and thus everybody else overslept. When the alarm did wake up, it wasn't with a customary "Mommy, awnt out!". I just heard him quietly singing Twinkle Twinkle and playing in his bed. I looked at the time. 8AM- my ETA at work but I couldn't drag myself out of bed. SiM wasn't demanding attention -why get up?

However, a few semi-awake minutes later I heard 'Me eat Potty Power...' No alarm could've worked better. I jumped out of bed in time to see SiM nibbling on the plastic cover of Potty Power DVD that I left on the dresser (now accessible to SiM) the night before.

I couldn't stop laughing for a few minutes. And every time I remember ' me eat Potty Power' I can't help but giggle. Who knows, maybe 'me' will help me get organized again...

Purim Sameach!

2009-03-09T22:58:00.003-04:00

Today a colleague told (reminded me) that this year she told her kids to give a shalach manot to someone who doesn't expect it ( from you, or possibly from anyone else) - a nursing home resident, someone who's Jewish but isn't religious, a less popular neighbor... And not just give loads and loads to popular friends and family.

Just a thought. Happy Purim!

On a happy note

2009-03-04T21:15:00.003-05:00

Number 15 arrived ( about a week ago a little white dot appeared). I really should've blogged about that instead of 'proportions and observations' but better late than never...

Also, SiM insists on calling himself a baby. He knows his full name ( including last name) but apparently thinks that we use it in jest and that his real name is baby...

I: What's your name?
SiM: Me baby.

I: Thanks for listening to mommy, you are such a mitzva boy!
SiM: No, me Baby!
I: You are my mitzva baby?
SiM: Yea (wea).

I: SiM, thanks for cleaning up the toys. You are such a big boy! And Eh helped me also-my mitzva girl!
SiM: Eh-girl, me-baby...

Square root day

2009-03-03T22:12:00.004-05:00

So geek squad is saying that today is a square root day- the month and the date are square roots of the year...
The previous one was 2/2/04 and the next one is...

Proportions and observations

2009-03-03T15:31:00.004-05:00

The longer I work, the more burnt out I get.
The higher I move in the work place 'hierarchy', the more incompetence I encounter.
The more I earn, the more excrement I have to ignore (and/or tolerate). [And I'm not going to talk about taxes here...]
The more burnt out I get, the less diplomacy is found in my conversations and in-services.
The more Department of Health representatives I encounter, the less I want to deal with them.
The cumulative effect of stupid people and things they do makes me less and less tolerant of them.
I realize (with some remorse) that I don't really want to keep attempting to save drowning people, if they don't want to be saved. Let them exercise their right to die.
I can sometimes succeed in teaching people to do their paperwork properly. I don't think I'm very successful in teaching them to care for their patients. And the gap between good documentation and good patient care is plain scary.

My mood at work is almost directly proportionate to the quality of coffee/snack availability that day.

To each his own

2009-03-01T21:24:00.003-05:00

Hubby works with a non Jewish guy whose name is Jonathan. Hubby calls him Yonatan and apparently the man doesn't mind.

Today I overheard one of hubby's BP customers mention that Yoinoson did a good job, etc. I almost cried from stifled laughter. When hubby finished his conversation with the customer I asked if Yoinoson knows to respond to his name. 'Of course,' said hubby, 'he worked there for a long time. She even used to feed him sandwiches...'

Is food really the answer to most dilemmas?

I can run but can I hide?

2009-02-28T20:18:00.003-05:00

On Friday instead of my customary grocery shopping during lunch, I go to the Village of Lawrence to shop for Purim. Luckily for me, there is a parking spot right in front of the store, so I turn on my blinker, pause a bit ( just in case the driver behind me didn't realize what the blinker was for), pull up to the car in front of the spot and that the stupid girl driving behind me is practically on my bumper.

I put my car in reverse, still hopeful that with a few maneuvers I'll get into the spot. But I hear the girl nervously signaling me...I roll down my window and gesture to her that I signaled, and paused, etc and there is a spot and all. Not sure if I point to my head in the process... But after gesticulating I look in the rear view mirror and realize that at this point, there are a few cars behind the girl. In the Village of Lawrence, unlike the Town of Brooklyn, they have parking lots behind the stores (a nuisance with muni meters and all but still better than no parking), so I give up my pursuit of a convenient spot and move on.

Within a minute, I get two text messages, almost simultaneously. I have an uneasy feeling that someone spotted me. The first message says " Was it you?" and then the second one, unnecessarily clarifies " on Central Avenue".

Why, from all my trips to the village, should it be a Brooklyn moment during which I get spotted by one of my dear friends? Bashert, I'm sure...

PS When I asked my friend why she didn't honk hello, she just replied " and miss the entertainment?" I guess life in the village is a bit slow.

New Year's Resolutions

2009-02-26T15:07:00.003-05:00

I cleaned my car the other day and found this gem from a nursing home's news letter. Following are the new year's resolutions of some of nursing home residents:

-My New Year's resolution is to get my family together. I want to go back to live with my family. I also want to have a good relationship with all the people in my past and the ones I'll meet in my future.

-I want to smoke less and read more. I also want to have a good friendship with everybody here (at the nursing home).

-I want to smoke less, and I want my family to come more often. I also want a TV in my room.

-I want everybody to like me. I want to stop cursing and screaming, and I want to be a good person.

-I want to get well and be to able to function on my own ( this resident since went home).

-My New Year's resolution is to stop crying, be nice to everybody, and to stop wearing a lot of makeup.

-My New Year's resolution is to be nice to people and to get along with them. I also want to stop smoking.

-I want to become a better person and stop taking things that are not mine.

-My New Year's resolution is to go back to my own apartment with my family. I want to get well, and I thank everyone at the nursing home for helping me (the man unfortunately is a nursing home hopper and is still residing @ the same institution).

-My New Year's resolution is to continue not to smoke, and to have my kids visit me.

Grandpa Lenin

2009-02-24T21:20:00.005-05:00

February is a black history month. And on February 2, the bulletin board of the mail lobby of my work announced this fact in Bold Black Letters with some obscenely (African themed?)colored trim, and the picture of our president in the middle.

Though similar displays appear on this bulletin board every year but this year it seemed strangely disturbing and borderline offensive. I attributed this uneasy feeling to possible lack of caffeine early in the AM and went on with my business.

Around lunch time, I noticed someone standing by the bulletin board, perplexed. To make a long story short, she told me that the bulletin board reminds her of the communists countries where the leaders picture was prominently displayed everywhere.

Bingo! That's what it was- the big red bulletin board with only one picture in the center (the shot above was taken a week later and even then, there was only one non-Obama picture on the whole board). It reminded me of my childhood with pictures, statues, busts, pins, and such of 'grandpa' Lenin in every public place.

Is this what this country coming to?

Time bomb

2009-02-23T21:44:00.000-05:00

This song keeps making its rounds in my mental play list...

The unhealthy state of mental health institutions

2009-02-21T21:37:00.004-05:00

Recently, Kings County Hospital's G (mental health) building made it to the papers because last year a patient died in the ER under guards' supervision and nobody gave much of a darn about it. One of the sad lessons- people in health care don't really care much about the sick ; they care even less for the mentally ill.

On my current assignment more than 50% of the residents have a psychiatric diagnosis. Many lead decent institutional lives and they are symptoms are controlled for months and even years.
Some become victims of the heavily regulated nursing home system. An in-house doctor, internist, decides that a patient is on too many psychotropic drugs and decided to reduce/discontinue some of them. The results are usually pretty quick. The resident starts seeing things, hearing things, think things, say things, or just act crazy. They a psychiatrist is called in to start the whole medication-adjustment process all over again.

In some instances, residents decompensate so quickly that they have to be admitted to a psych hospital. (Psych hospitals deserve a few entries of their own) And that's the reason for this post...
Here's a 'case study':
Time was admitted to a nursing home after 7 weeks of psych hospitalization for some 'unruly' behavior. When I first came to see him, he was a scary crazy man- talked to himself non-stop, looked through you if you addressed him, inconsistently followed basic conversation, the works.
After staying in the nursing home for less then 2 weeks he was hospitalized for some unacceptable behavior.

Tim was readmitted to the nursing home a 3 weeks later. He was almost unrecognizable- he looked physically healthy. His conversations not only became coherent but also very intelligent and pleasant. Tim was a new man, but sadly, not for long. After a month or so, his conversations became less coherent, he became more preoccupied and frequently inappropriate. Two weeks after the reappearance of his symptoms he was back in a psych hospital.

That hospitalization lasted a bit over a month. But based on the hospital paper work, they weren't treating his symptoms but rather 'managing' them. In hospital he received medication for agitation which was frequently given to him via injection ( to kick in faster). After weeks of such ' management' ( my guess is-hospital was hungry for some of Tim's insurance $), Tim was ready to come back to the nursing home.

Tim was readmitted early in the afternoon. I saw him in the lobby and welcomed him back. He thanked me. But as kept walking, he told me that I have a nice body " and a sharp mind" he added quickly. I told Tim he was inappropriate. He apologized but I wondered what exactly did they do for Tim in the hospital?

Half hour later I heard very loud screams and cursing in the lobby. It happens quite frequently, so I ignored the screams at first. My coworker said it was one of the residents who was upset about the new smoking hours. But the screaming continued on and off for 5 minutes. I decided to check out the situation for myself.

There were 2 EMS guys standing in the middle of a hallway. Near a wall, 2 female cops were trying to handcuff someone. That someone was Tim. He had a somewhat surprised look on his face, trying to tell something to the cops. EMTs looked sympathetic and even a bit embarrassed. The cops were just doing their job. And I felt physically sick.

It took a few minutes after Tim was handcuffed and put in a chair for the paperwork to be filled out. And then Tim was led away into the freezing cold in just a tshirt, back to the same hospital which didn't do much for Tim. Yet Tim had to pay for the incompetence of the doctors by being subdued, handcuffed, and humiliated, and be sent there for more 'management of his symptoms'.

Oops!

2009-02-19T20:24:00.004-05:00

In HS, I had a halacha teacher who used to give us demerits for talking. Then there was an economics teacher with a minus-point system - get even 1 minus point and no matter how high your average is you won't be exempt from taking finals.

And today, after all these years, I felt like I was in high school again!

Because of some bizarre circumstances, some gullibility, and some lack of basic thought, I had to be in court today. The court room was exceptionally hot, the wait even more exceptional, and I ( naturally) didn't bring any reading material with me.

The court clerk was a rather mean woman ( possibly with a heartburn?) who kept yelling at people to behave as they should in court. At one point, some grandpa's phone went off, loudly, twice in a span of 2 minutes, so the clerk confiscated the phone, turned it off, and said she'll return it after grandpa is done.

By this point, over an hour passed. I was bored and tired of waiting for my lawyer to show up. Then, my chatty friend whose whisper carries ( and who came along with me to court) got a seat right next to me and started talking about something or other.

And I almost jumped when I suddenly heard the court clerk right in front of me saying "You two, step out!". I probably should've been offended, or try to say that I won't do it again. But I couldn't stop grinning while I took my coat and stepped outside. And I'm still grinning as I type.

PS As we stepped outside, my lawyer showed up and told me that I can go. I wonder if the people inside that court room learned a valuable lesson: if you talk in court room, you'll have to step out, and not return for the rest of the day!

If it makes you happy...

2009-02-17T08:29:00.004-05:00

I'm not too good with remembering to bring food/lunch to work. I was in 7th food Haven when I worked in a place with a kosher cafeteria. When I switched assignments, I first managed with 2 pieces of whole wheat bread and/or cereal and until I discovered a (relatively) local pizza shop. Soon after that I started eating there almost exclusively.

Recently, I realized that my constant pizza trips became visible. But at the same time Sheryl Crow's song 'if it makes you happy, it can't be that bad' came to mind. I felt somewhat comforted -weight gain isn't the end of the world...

Then I remembered that Sheryl Crow also advocated to use one square of toilet paper per bathroom trip in her effort to be earth friendly. That idea is so darn bad it couldn't make anyone ( including Sheryl) happy. EEeeW!

So I switched to burgers and burritos.

On cooking, part II

2009-02-11T21:23:00.001-05:00

Thanks to one of my coworkers, I've discovered a relatively local kosher grocery where I shop on Fridays during lunch. 2 Friday's ago I found peeled and pre-cut butternut squash there which I bought with a plan of making a cream of squash soup the following Sunday.

Sunday came and went. Then Friday came again. The squash was still in my fridge, alive (whew) but sadly uncooked.

Sunday again. But my hopes of cream of squash soup were still not realized. And then...my mom came to visit. In conversation she mentioned that we traditionally cook rice with pumpkin and raisins and things. I immediately realized why my butternut squash was so resilient ( whereas other fruits and veggies often didn't survive half the time in my fridge. Strange how even veggies know who can make better use of them...)!

I immediately told my mom that I have some butternut squash in my fridge. Mom kindly offered to cook the rice for me (squash being the next best thing after pumpkin).
In short, we had a very delicious Tu B'shvat dinner of rice with squash, salad (also made by mom from rescued veggies), and lots of fruit. My mother also cooked complimentary vegetable soup for the following day (my fridge had lots of stuff that needed rescuing, I guess).

The lesson- whenever a parent visits, do not be shy to mention what's hiding in your fridge.

Before I forget

2009-02-08T21:55:00.003-05:00

They are finally here!Tooth number 13 (top L canine) came about 10 days ago, and number 14 (top R canine) a few days ago.

A couple of days ago, in celebration of the new teeth I found strength ( or probably because I had none) to let my SiM stay (cry, read books, watch cartoons) in bed in the morning for approx 30 minutes while I slept a bit more. When I finally got him out of bed close to 7 AM he told me " Mommy, me crying bed..." He didn't accuse, just stated the facts. And I felt a bit guilty about my 'extra' half hour of sleep.

I also figured out ( now that I'm feeling better) that last week's severe chills were probably mild flu symptoms. Thank Gd for the flu shot!

All non-believers, take it from a converted non-believer--flu shots help and are definitely worth some mild side effects that may come along.

Recycling

2009-02-03T22:40:00.003-05:00

Last Wednesday was a snow day. It was also a recycling collection day. The sanitation people showed up early on Thursday and randomly collected some paper and cans.

It's Tuesday night and it snowed. And my dilemma is quite simple. Do I put out 1.5 weeks worth of recycling in hopes that since it snowed today, tomorrow would be a regular garbage pick up day? Do I not take out the recycling because there is snow on the ground and the sanitation department is going to be busy with snow removal tomorrow ( a preferred option @ the moment since I don't really want to get dressed and to the whole garbage-day-prep routine)?
OR do I just remind myself that the whole recycling routine is hubby's chore and let him have his own dilemmas (the best option yet, if I pretend to forget that today is hubby's bday and it would be a nice gesture on my part to take care of the Tuesday evening 'routine')?

And naturally the best case scenario would be if hubby won't notice that the recycling isn't out tonight and tomorrow, before work I'll take care of the whole thing as a happy-birthday-good-will-gesture.

And because I put so much thought into it, something tells me the recycling won't be picked up after all...Time shall tell.

Road Rage

2009-02-01T20:56:00.005-05:00

I don't like bad mannered people and I don't like bad mannered drivers. And in my younger days I used to show bad mannered drivers exactly what I think about them. But now I'm a mom of two. I don't return favors to those who cut me off, don't let me merge, etc. I just keep driving, listening to Bloomberg radio.

Today shouldn't have been different. Except the passenger of a car that tried to illegally pass me on the left, as I was waiting at a traffic light, cursed me out in Russian, and I saw an ugly russian face glare at me. If I was cursed in English, I'd laugh it off and let it be. But that face and russian language...

Unfortunately, at that moment, I forgot that I'm a mom of two. I pulled up evenly to that ugly woman and told her that as a russian cannibal she should mind her own business. Cannibal's driver didn't take well to it and, to continued cursing, edged in even closer to me. Cannibal looked so enraged, for a second I thought she'd spit at me. And then the light changed and the mom of two didn't let russian cannibals pass her.

I was definitely ahead and then, I heard an unpleasant scratching noise. The cannibal was in front of my car before I got a chance to put on my blinker. This time she was cursing and yelling in Russian. And telling her husband, the driver, to call the police.

I got out of the car, trying to see if there were any pedestrian witnesses. I asked a couple of people (who happened to be Jewish) standing on the sidewalk if they saw what happened. At this point, Russian cannibal started screaming that now jews will start fabricating stories. I had a weird flashback to 6th grade where one of my Russian classmates got upset at me for some reason and started yelling 'go back to your Israel!'...

The cops didn't show up for over an hour. In the mean time, I got the chills and sat shivering in my car with the heat full blast. The cannibal woman was unpleasant and unreasonable throughout. It wasn't just her yelling, cursing, and seeing red. She was filled with so much hate that she was willing to pushing her husband whose insurance would go up, as long as I'd get punished...

Thank Gd, with help of hubby, the driver (amid cannibal calling him stupid) and I (can't even list all the names the cannibal called me) settled right before the cops arrived.

I know this accident was more their fault than mine. I wanted the police report to prove it. But sometimes it's not as important to be right as it is to be practical. Thank Gd the accident just bruised my car and my ego. And I hope and pray that I don't let myself be provoked by a cannibal again.

Parent rivalry?

2009-01-27T21:53:00.005-05:00

It's usually SiM who gives preferential treatment (see here) to Abba. Today it was sort of Eh's turn.

"Mommy, I gave a big kiss to Abba!' she told me. Hmm. Abba is in the office, taking care of some business. Why did he get a kiss and not me who was supervising pre-sleep jumping in bed?

"Can I get a kiss also?" I asked nonchalantly. "Ok, but let me give a kiss to SiM, first," said my firstborn while I patiently waited. SiM was touched by this show of affection from his sister and took out his pacy to blow her a kiss back. Then I was instructed to turn my cheek towards Eh and I finally got my slightly wet kiss.

At that moment I was probably the proudest parent in Brooklyn. And as an after thought I was comforted in the knowledge that even though I wasn't the first (or even 2nd) to get a "big kiss", I'm usually the one and only to whom Eh comes in the middle of the night to ask for 'hot milk, please'.

Aging gracefully

2009-01-26T22:26:00.003-05:00

The phrase 'insidious onset' comes to mind. Some things happen suddenly. And some take such a long time to happen that one can't really put a finger on the exact 'before and after'.

Well, since the events mentioned below, I just don't know what to think about my situation.

On Friday, after lighting the candles it was a bit of a nuisance saying the bracha after the candle lighting because it was obstructed by something. I managed. Immediately after lighting, I realized that my shabbat flowers are not on the dining room table. I went to the kitchen. They weren't there, either. I looked all around. Then I asked the babysitter if she knew what happened to the flowers. There was a slight pause after which she tentatively told me that they were on the piano. OH. The obstruction turned out to be a vase with my flowers...

On Sunday, I had a choice of buying The Simpsons calendar or Phrases on Aging. I won't even mention which one I bought because I know I don't have to...

In the morning, during my AM routine, I noticed a white hair on my head and instead of pulling or cutting it, I just thought "thank Gd for my hair" and continued with the routine...

Lastly, a few minutes ago I was about to inform hubby that he used my towel ( and almost walked out of the bathroom with the evidence) only to suddenly realize that it almost happened the other way around.

This prompted me to write this post and a memo to self to remove the 'aging' calendar from the car tomorrow.

RoadKill

2009-01-22T21:55:00.005-05:00

It was an ordinary Thursday. My colleagues and I were driving back to work from lunch. There were two pigeons on the road, doing their bird things. My colleague slowed down. One of the pigeons flew away at the last second. And then we heard a thud. And in the rear view mirror, I saw a bunch of feathers on the road.

'You Killed a pigeon', I told the driver. And though he denied it at first, he saw the evidence, too. And for the next 7 minutes, he kept repeating that he couldn't believe that he killed a pigeon. I tried to comfort him saying that pigeons are lazy and stupid and statistically they become most frequent bird roadkill. My other coworker altogether said that the pigeon was sick, didn't want to live ( hence didn't fly away in time), and it was meant to be.

The dead pigeon was the talk of the gym when we returned. Everyone had a story to tell of how they try not to kill an animal/bird on the road...how they witnessed animal to animal violence...where one can find the most roadkill in the 5 boroughs, etc.

Overall, it was an unpleasant experience and I'm glad it a-didn't happen on the way to lunch, as I'm sure 66% of the party would've lost their appetite; b- there were no kids around who witnessed this event; c-for the reminder that pigeons have a dulled sense of self preservation.

Wishing all the drivers safe and pleasant commute.

Bread and butter AKA payback

2009-01-19T22:04:00.003-05:00

For the past few weeks, as soon as I'd turn of the lights or try to say Shma with Eh, she tells me that she's hungry and needs to eat something.

I'm well aware that it's her way of postponing her bedtime. But sometimes I give in and take her downstairs to eat a sandwich or a couple of crackers. To make a long story short, it's becoming a scary routine where as soon as she gets into her bed Eh says that she'd like to eat crackers with cream cheese ( or 2 crackers, or just crackers...).

I'm trying to take this in stride. May be she is really hungry because she isn't a great eater (and there are only so many creative pasta suppers I can make- and anyway she prefers her pasta free of any 'dressing').

Or maybe it's just payback for all those times I made a scene of not going to sleep without getting my 'bread and butter'? I remember having a phase where I'd have to eat bread and butter (after staying in bed for a bit) before going to sleep...

A couple of days ago I told my mom about my 'crackers with cream cheese' issue. I even apologized for driving her crazy. She told me it wasn't a bother at all... And if that's the case, maybe this isn't payback but just an opportunity for Eh and me to have our little girl-chats over some crackers.

The unpopular kid

2009-01-14T22:52:00.000-05:00

The kid had a bit of a mousy appearance- dirty blond hair that didn't stay in the pony, navy-gray clothes, a bit of a cold. He kept trying to touch the snacks before they were giving out and the teacher kept telling him 'don't touch! Don't touch that, Mike". He was sitting right next to the teacher but he got his snack second to last. Ditto for the drink (I actually pointed out to the teacher that he didn't get milk).

The other kids didn't seem to pay much attention to him, either. It appeared that he was the unpopular kid...

When the parents came to pick up their kids, Mike didn't rush to his mom like many other kids did. And I, with a sort of sick fascination, was staring her. When Mike finally got ready and came to his mother, she was very affectionate with him. She kissed Mike, and hugged him, complimented his a&c that he had in his hand.

Mike transformed from the unpopular kid into someone very dear and loved.

For some reason, though I met Mike only once, I remember his quite well. And, when I encounter someone who at best can be described as a 'nebach' I try to remind myself that not only is this someone is a human being but s/he's also someone's Mike, someone's pride and joy. And Mike deserves to be treated fairly.

On cooking

2009-01-12T18:32:00.002-05:00

For a while now I've been specializing in frozen-ingredients, well done, and one pot meals.
I still have the good intention of cooking more sophisticated meals and stuff my fridge and pantry with all the right ingredients. But more often than not, many of these ingredients end up slowly dying in the fridge or hiding on top shelves and I keep perfecting my specialization.

Yesterday I realized that the shredded cabbage (could-have-been cole slaw or cabbage soup) and steak (lean and clean, good for grilling, baking, stuffing) should be cooked or else. Meat and cabbage stew came to mind-easy, healthy, reheats well.

I sauteed onions and garlic, added the meat and spices, and lowered the flame to simmer. Then I realized that we no longer have plastic forks and plates. So I decided to go out and buy them. I checked on the meat-the onions and the meat let out lots of water, enough to cook for a good to be palatable and easily chewable for the younger generation.

After I left my house I realized that it was Sunday night. All the local stores were closed and I was too tired (lazy?) to drive for 15 min just to get disposable dishes. I called my sister who said she has some plastic forks to spare. I took the forks but then decided to come up for some tea...

To make the long story short, I came home an hour and 20 minutes later. The house was filled with the scent of cooking meat. Without taking off my coat I rushed to the kitchen, lifted the lid from the meat pot and saw that there was still had plenty of liquid left in the pot. Whew and thank Gd! The meat must be really tender now, cooking with lots of onions for over an hour. I added the cabbage, cooked the whole thing for another 20 minutes and went to bed.

I served the stew for dinner today. Hubby complimented me on the taste and the tenderness of the meat. I told him that I cooked it for a very long time, etc.

"Yea, you left the house with the meat on the stove. When I came to the kitchen, the pot was almost dry and I added a whole cup of water to it."

Thus, my successful simmer-lots-of-onions-with-thin-strips-of-meat stew ended up just another failed well done dish thanks to hubby's keen sense of smell. But in the end, we all (including now-picky Eh) enjoyed it and that's what matters.

Tomorrow's menu includes some Indian chicken which will be cooked right before dinner (and the chicken's will finish defrosting by tomorrow). So there is still hope for the return of gourmet meals...

I'll be wearing my work clothes

2009-01-03T21:44:00.004-05:00

I once went on a date with a lawyer. Since we worked in the same neighborhood, we agreed to meet soon after work. And after we agreed on the day and time of the date he added (quite unnecessarily?) that he'll be wearing his work clothes. I said that I'll be wearing mine and we left it at that though I wondered if I should take my lab coat in my pocketbook ( just in case).
In the end, the guy wasn't even worth me showing up in a robe but that's not what this post is about.

It appears that some work clothes are better than others. Often business people (i.e. those who have to have a 'professional' appearance) quite often find it acceptable to show up at an evening social function wearing their 'work' clothes, regardless of the general appearance of these clothes. A suit is a suit.

A couple of times I've noticed doctors (medical residents) attending a function in scrubs. Granted , doctor is a respectable profession. But a uniform at a social function is neither respectable nor respectful.

Would it be ok for a nursing assistant to show up in scrubs? Would a nursing assistant or a nurse (wearing exact same scrubs) ever allow him/herself this liberty. How about a mechanic in an oily blue one-piece, or a butcher in a blood splatters apron? Can a train conductor or a police officer show up at an engagement party or a brit in their uniform?

Or do I need to get out more?

Happy Birthday to Eh!!!

2009-01-01T00:05:00.003-05:00

It's official today. 3rd anniversary of my new, most challenging and rewarding identity as a mom.

My little Eh is 3 years old. Thanks to her I appreciate so many aspects of life (including my parents) which I saw in a completely different light (and sometimes not at all) until I became a parent. I think I even understand (possibly my perceived) special place my sister (the oldest of us) has in my parents' hearts. I didn't lose my middle child complex but the resentment is gone. Each child is unique and special but only the first one changes your status:)

Two thoughts come to mind. My friend's words (which at that time I heard with scepticism and now think of with appreciation) that you don't really start living until you have kids. And, as retold by my sister, my comment , as I pointed to my very-pregnant-with-Eh stomach: 'Once this comes out, I'll never be alone'.

May Hashem give you health and happiness, my little one; you should continue to grow to be a constant source of pride and joy to us and all of the Jewish people!

My nachat update

2008-12-30T23:09:00.003-05:00

Somehow (again) I got carried away from my main reason for blogging. So here's an update on my yidishe nachas.

For about 2 weeks now SiM started pronouncing Eh's name correctly. It's very sweet and touching. I'm trying to teach him how to whisper (unsuccessfully of course, but it does good to my psyche) because in the morning he 'unt Eh' to play with him and I prefer for her to sleep as long as possible.

Eh sings the dreidel song quite well. SiM can finish all the 'stanza's of the dreidel song and loves to listen to me singing svivon ('unt moh svivon').

SiM knows lots of nursery rhymes and songs but the only thing he'd hear in the car is 'abba song' which is an instrumental CD of shabbat songs. The original 'abba song' is traditional shalom aleichem.

SiM's a party kid. Not only does he love dancing but he encourages others to dance as well. And when we went to a wedding a few days ago, he was clapping (without prompts) together with the rest of the guests, as various ppl walked down the isle.

Earlier today Eh's let SiM play with a latka-in-a-pan toy she made in her play group. They were taking turns catching the latka on the pan. At one point, SiM didn't get the latke where it was supposed to go, yet Eh happily cheered for him
"Good for you! You did a great job with catching the latka! Almost..."

Eh is SiM's teacher (vocabulary, play, squabble, etc). Recently, Eh started saying 'mines' instead of mine. Naturally, when it came to getting a treat/toy/anything, Eh would say (scream?) 'mines' and SiM would answer 'No, mines!'
Today, during dinner we were trying to decide who gets a Nemo cup and who, an Elmo cup. Eh said That cup is MineH (got to love all the great 'things' kids pick up at daycare). Sim replied - No, MineH! And I realized (and shared my epiphany with hubby) that if we continue to consistently speak with Eh in Hebrew, we may not need to work so hard with SiM.

And finally, tomorrow is Eh's birthday party @ play group and I cannot contain my excitement. I shopped for goodies for tomorrow's peckalach only to realize that
1- I still need to buy a birthday cake or cupcakes for all (This info because available around 10P after I spoke to Eh's morah);
2- The party bags that I bought are exceptionally cute and can barely hold 40%-less-fat-than-regular-corn-puffs let alone all the other stuff that I bought in 3 (three) different stores. I'm considering brown bagging it (hoping that my local grocery sells brown bags)...

Meme, edited

2008-12-29T23:47:00.002-05:00

Thanks to Moshe's comment and "Dina's interpretation of my tag, I've edited my meme.

Peace

Unforgettable, that's what I'm not

2008-12-29T17:46:00.002-05:00

Shabbat Chanuka I encountered a former classmate (high school). I came over. Said hi. Confirmed that she was who I think she was. She said she can't recall my name. I said it. She asked me if we went to seminary together...I, quite unnecessarily said, "high school".

My former classmate had a few kids around her...And for the rest of shabbat I had a recurrent and disturbing thought that maybe my pregnancy/childbearing-related memory loss is not as temporary as I hoped.

Meme

2008-12-28T22:52:00.009-05:00

I can't believe I was tagged... For a double meme. Thanks Mike,I thought I'll just do one but thanks to Moshe, I'm doing both...

Here are the rules: Grab the nearest book. Open the book to page 56. Find the fifth sentence. Post the text of the next two to five sentences in your journal/blog along with these instructions. Don’t dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST. Tag five other people to do the same.

---Uncle Vernon looked as though he has something stuck in his throat; Aunt Petunia, however, was oddly flushed. "Well, Harry...time for us to be off," said Dumbledore at last, standing up and straightening his long black cloak. "Until we meet again," he said to the Dursleys, who looked as though that moment could wait forever as far as they were concerned, and after doffing his hat, he swept from the room.

Truth be told, this was not the CLOSEST book. More than 40 closest books didn't have page 56. And the next closest book had a graph on page 56 and examples of regression analyses on pages 57 and 58. This was the 3rd closest. Hope it counts.

Seven Facts About Me:
The Rules:
1. Link to your blogger and list these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people (if possible) at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blogs.

1. I like cars and I love driving. I also enjoy 'challenging' fast or expensive car drivers.

2. I know how to milk cows.

3. I used to enjoy catching bees, flies, and spiders. I no longer remember how to safely catch bees though.

4. I went to Touro college because the campus was around the corner from my house.

5. I usually remember names, diagnoses, physical appearance, room numbers, insurance info, date of admission, etc. of any patient with whom I have any contact for the duration of my assignment ( and sometimes longer). I usually cannot recall the name of the main character in a movie/book as soon as I finish watching the movie/reading the book.

6. I love fresh bread and butter.

7. I bought myself earrings for my 13th birthday and pierced my ears for my 16th.

I'm tagging Barb,Subjugatedwife, and
"Dina as they appear not to have been tagged by this one yet...

You aren't that yeshivish

2008-12-26T01:06:00.003-05:00

Last Friday, I took SiM to MD @ 10:30. Then it snowed. So I had the luxury of a couple of hours to do what I please. So I decided to indulge in the forgotten luxury also knows as manicure.

In the nail place (calling it a salon would make me a superlatives user, so I shan't) I met one of my old neighbors. She asked me where I'm sending Eh next year.

Eh's school happens to be a bit of personal current events. My inefficient pushing combined with my unnecessary honesty resulted in Eh ( and me) missing some important deadlines. So I told this neighbor a short summary of our somewhat frustrating school application process. Then I mentioned that I'm still thinking of a couple of schools. The neighbor immediately told me not even attempt one of them because 'it's NOT for you *with a sourish face*'. Ok. I was just telling my options, not final decisions...Whatever.

Time in the nail places is kind of slow so we continued the conversation and I asked where the neighbor sends her daughters. She told me. And added right away. "But you aren't yeshivish ..." I agreed with her again and conversation dwindled.

A few minutes later I noticed one of this neighbor's daughters doing her nails, too. She was dressed exactly like me (minus the head covering/plus glam hair).

And since those nails take a long time to polish and dry, I sat there thinking. Why point out how unyeshivish my family is instead of describing the general parent body of the school? Why dispense invaluable advise to someone you see once in 6 months? And, was this just a case of yeshivish 'figi' and not-yeshivish 'vicked'?

Truck driver for a day

2008-12-24T15:53:00.002-05:00

Today, for the second time this month, I got the honor (and the pleasure) of driving a Cadillac pick up truck. Here are some of my observations ( as seen from the driver's seat of a pick up truck):

1. Men stared.
2. Women stared.
3. A double parked yiddishe mench in a minivan did a double take.
4. Sedans cut me off less.
5. Those sedans and SUVs that did cut off/pass me, invariably showed off how fast they can really go.
6. Pedestrians were more cautious (except for one who tested pick up's breaks. b"H they passed).
7. Every pick up truck (especially domestic) challenged me to a race.
8. I felt like I was driving a tractor.
9. I enjoyed all the puddles, ponds, and mini lakes instead of driving around them.
10. A colleague pointed out that people with low self esteem typically overcompensate by driving big cars.I'm still thinking about this one...

What would you like for your birthday?

2008-12-23T21:17:00.004-05:00

Eh's birthday is on Chanuka. And Eh's been looking forward to Chanuka for quite some times now.
On shabbat, hubby asked Eh what she'd like for her birthday. She said "I want a doll for chanuka and a balloon for my birthday." Hubby assured her that she'd get a doll and kept asking what else, besides the balloon, would Eh like for her birthday.
The reply was quite consistent - a buba for chanuka and a balloon for birthday.

Today after dinner I told Eh that as soon as she and SiM wash their hands they'd get their chanuka presents. However, the washing up process was taking a bit longer than anticipated. I started losing my patience and said to Eh that if she doesn't want her doll (by taking her time with handwashing), we can send it back to the store. Eh's response?

'I want the doll. And SiM wants a balloon.'